About hermitknut : I prefer to remain an enigma. >.> Nah, I have an LJ account and a twitter, same username. Userpic is by http://likealight.livejournal.com. Evening all.
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Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10273) - you deserved it (22451)
On 01/11/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by bunnyluver4545 - United States (Texas)
Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27870) - you deserved it (4962)
On 12/16/2011 at 9:29pm - kids - by DocBastard (man) - Reserved
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20586) - you deserved it (12259)
On 12/13/2011 at 7:26am - love - by reallyman__639 - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, a guy lost control of his umbrella in the wind, which then hit me in the eye, making me bleed. He screamed at me for trying to steal his umbrella. People laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26550) - you deserved it (1347)
On 11/29/2011 at 6:59pm - misc - by anon - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I have my first university lecture on lab safety. Having gone out the night before with my house-mates, I have the worst hangover of my life, and have to listen for an hour and a half while they loudly demonstrate the types of alarms we'll hear in different kinds of emergencies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9614) - you deserved it (33454)
On 11/02/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by ...loud noises...urgh... (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25379) - you deserved it (36770)
On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States
Today, I had to do a "damage report" on myself after going to the midnight premiere of Harry Potter. As I was waiting for the previews, a 20 year old man dressed as a house elf tackled and wrestled me for my seat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21027) - you deserved it (3600)
On 07/15/2011 at 1:01pm - health - by beachbumb8538 - United States
Today, my Dad married his fiancée, who insists I call her "mom". I'm three years older than her, and went to the same high school. She's taking me shopping next week to buy me something "nice". FML
I agree, your life sucks (63438) - you deserved it (2811)
On 05/22/2011 at 5:31am - misc - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom
Today, my "friend" told me I was weird and irritating. Yet she has an unhealthy obsession with Harry Potter, hates people in general, and has a Facebook for her cat. Yeah, I'm the weird one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28153) - you deserved it (5992)
On 04/26/2011 at 5:45am - animals - by weirdome23 (woman) - United States
Today, while socializing after a church service, I discovered I'm still referred to as "Fireshit's brother", after an incident a year ago which involved my sister screaming "the devil is coming out of my anus!" from the lavatory. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23234) - you deserved it (2378)
On 12/25/2010 at 1:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)
Today, stood in line for hours to see the new Harry Potter. Unfortunately, once inside the theater, I was stuck in the bathroom with the runs for the entire length of the movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24787) - you deserved it (4996)
On 11/19/2010 at 4:20pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43013) - you deserved it (7301)
On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, the woman who sits behind me in class showed up. She shrieks in laughter until she has coughing fits every time anything even remotely sexual is mentioned, including evidence in sexual assault cases. Lectures are 3 hours long, twice a week, and I need this class to graduate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21165) - you deserved it (1543)
On 09/28/2010 at 9:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42863) - you deserved it (6018)
Today, thanks to my brilliant hairstylist, I ended up with a brand new haircut, which I like to call the "Bowler hat-and-Spaghetti" cut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14945) - you deserved it (2076)
On 02/28/2010 at 2:00pm - misc - by AtikaSucks (woman) - Tunisia
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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