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helloimclaudia

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helloimclaudia

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 8 November 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 625
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About helloimclaudia : About me:
I'm a seventeen year old girl from The Netherlands. I speak Dutch, English, a little bit of French and a little bit of German. One of my goals is learning Spanish.
Right now, I'm in the fifth, and last, class of high school. (For the dutch people, 5 havo.) You could say that I'm in senior year.

helloimclaudia's page activity

Visits<b>sju91</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 11:14pm<b>denardo</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 6:20pm<b>Nyleriver</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 5:06am<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 12:16am<b>Badman6969</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 8:27pm<b>Dreagoon</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 1:43am<b>the_outsider</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 6:51pm<b>omgpp</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:51pm<b>NicoleErin</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 10:44pm<b>stonedfly3</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:54pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 9:24pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 9:39am<b>boostedc</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 5:37pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 4:02pm<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 6:16pm<b>AviatOfficial</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 12:25pm<b>abylenee_</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 11:07am<b>domking1315</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 1:34pm

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helloimclaudia's favorite FMLs

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35345) - you deserved it (9211)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

#21261205
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33922) - you deserved it (4372)

On 09/19/2014 at 11:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I jokingly told my friend that I was the kid who stole his brand new glow-in-the-dark markers back in kindergarten. Now he's ignoring my texts and calls and says we're through. So much for our twelve years of friendship. FML

#20918380
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39413) - you deserved it (9659)

On 10/13/2013 at 12:33am - misc - by markerThief (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55037) - you deserved it (64169)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, whilst driving past a cyclist, I thought it would be funny to make him jump by blasting my horn right behind him and then driving off. I guess he thought it would be funny to catch up with me, yank off my wing-mirror, and hurl it through the open window at my face. FML

Today, I was in a bathroom stall and I accidentally dropped my new tampon on the ground. Just as I was about to reach for it, I heard a voice on the other side of the stall say, "Oh great, I needed that" and then a hand reached under my stall and grabbed it. It was my last one. FML

#20647074
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58819) - you deserved it (4596)

On 05/07/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by the girl next door (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

#20640565
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67184) - you deserved it (9913)

On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, it was raining heavily so I wore my black poncho as I walked to work. On the way there I noticed an old and seemingly homeless man following me. I turned around to confront him. He picked up a stick and screamed "Expecto Patronum!" Apparently I look like a dementor. FML

#20558527
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31248) - you deserved it (5892)

On 03/24/2013 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anna L. - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter had a meltdown when I told her I donated some of her old toys to Goodwill. It turns out Toy Story has taught her that toys have feelings and that she has a meaningful relationship with them. She's in her teens. FML

#20167023
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14482) - you deserved it (22904)

On 11/17/2012 at 5:31pm - kids - by susan (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML

#20151986
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19602) - you deserved it (6373)

On 11/07/2012 at 12:11am - misc - by Squid (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

#20141194
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30883) - you deserved it (3431)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML

#20136968
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23369) - you deserved it (5173)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML

#20135671
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9023) - you deserved it (32845)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said "I can't do this any more" and pulled out. After repeatedly asking him what was wrong, he basically told me that I suck in bed. Apparently, the way I "just lie there" makes him feel like a necrophile. FML

#20092519
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12001) - you deserved it (44778)

On 09/28/2012 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada

Today, I walked in to my apartment to see my husband sitting there with his toes painted pink. When I asked him why, he said, "I wanted to feel pretty." This is the man who is about to be the father of my child. FML



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