Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 22145
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted


heartless's page activity

Visits<b>AquanTheDragon</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 5:56pm<b>foxychik10704</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 2:57pm<b>jacc16</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 12:46am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 1:07pm<b>relaxfreak</b> - the 12/30/2010 at 7:14pm<b>thunderdome41</b> - the 10/06/2010 at 3:28pm<b>LittleMissTexter</b> - the 10/04/2010 at 11:05pm<b>Albinoundead</b> - the 10/03/2010 at 3:12pm<b>ashlynn610</b> - the 10/03/2010 at 3:09pm<b>moonlight_daze</b> - the 10/22/2009 at 6:27pm<b>sophiereuss</b> - the 08/23/2009 at 11:13pm<b>wdaareg</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 9:39pm<b>Sunol</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 8:52pm<b>Kevinslath</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 1:49am<b>wbrycem</b> - the 05/16/2009 at 10:14pm<b>poolguy3</b> - the 05/15/2009 at 8:15pm<b>waaah</b> - the 05/15/2009 at 7:42pm<b>heartless1024</b> - the 05/15/2009 at 5:18pm

heartless's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of heartless's badges

heartless's favorite FMLs

Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year old son answered the door and when he saw me said, 'oh great, it's YOU' and slammed the door in my face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25371) - you deserved it (4547)

On 10/03/2010 at 3:40am - kids - by notyouagain (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I lost my anal virginity because my boyfriend "slipped". FML


I agree, your life sucks (52506) - you deserved it (21265)

On 06/11/2010 at 12:56am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at dinner with my boyfriend and my family, my mother had too much to drink and asked my boyfriend how I was in bed with the purpose of embarrassing me. His reply? "Not as good as her sister." His defense? "It was only one time." FML


I agree, your life sucks (26152) - you deserved it (2424)

On 09/12/2009 at 3:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my parents decided I was old enough to know that my mother doesnt really have horrible nightmares. She's a screamer. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34793) - you deserved it (2496)

On 08/31/2009 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by UGH (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, we got my brother a pet hamster because he has trouble making friends. We thought a hamster would be a good way to teach him about caring for others. I walked into the room and the hamster was hanging from the ceiling. Turns out there's a reason my brother doesn't have friends. FML


I agree, your life sucks (70734) - you deserved it (4842)

On 06/06/2009 at 1:51am - animals - by hamsterlovinn (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML


I agree, your life sucks (673854) - you deserved it (452569)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by KAAALIS (woman) - United States (New York)

Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: