hazardoussmiles9

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hazardoussmiles9

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2074
  • Number of comments : 108
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About hazardoussmiles9 : Disregard my username, it's ridiculous and I hate it.

hazardoussmiles9's page activity

Visits<b>ABlindMan</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 2:25pm<b>jill97</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 10:59pm<b>DBJ99</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 1:57am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 8:25am<b>lukian</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 4:25am<b>WordBea</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 8:05am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 10:06pm<b>0mysteriousman0</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 8:03pm<b>Thinkitthrough</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 8:47pm<b>arealsexybitch</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 4:36pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 4:11pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 3:52pm<b>amazing_race190</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 3:22pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 1:01pm<b>DARKDAY07</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 11:26pm<b>IamHercules</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 3:38pm<b>Rozza17</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 5:26pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 2:18am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 2:25pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 9:52pm<b>eaglerob</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 4:43am

hazardoussmiles9's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The rules are the rules

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Perfectionist

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hazardoussmiles9's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my cat to the vet's. When the vet took her temperature anally, I couldn't stop laughing. The vet had to ask me to leave the room. FML

by FreeChocolate / 12/09/2013 at 8:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

by thank god you'll only live once / 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I've been awake for nearly three days due to homework and my mom's wedding preparations, so I took some adderall to keep me awake at school. I took too much, totally zoned out in class, became hopelessly fascinated by my own hand, and was accused of doing drugs. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2013 at 12:43pm / United States (Nebraska) / Health

Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML

by nl4 / 11/01/2013 at 7:55pm / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Health

Today, I decided to get over my lifelong fear of Michael Jackson. I went to have my photo taken with a statue of him. Little did I know, for Halloween week they replace the statues with real people. It jumped out at me; I'm never getting over this fear. FML

by Shady_Soldier / 10/31/2013 at 4:41am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to try LSD with a few friends in a safe environment. As an artist, I had planned to spend my trip doing psychedelic paintings and had all my supplies set up. Apparently I spent most of my time in fetal position muttering about the "evil easel" and never even touched my canvas. FML

by oldshitnewshit / 10/22/2013 at 5:11pm / United States / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

by Anonymous / 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I dreamt that I beat someone up for using Comic Sans in a project. Now I can't look at him without being irrationally angry. FML

by Ellie / 10/09/2013 at 7:15pm / United States (Kansas) / Work

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I faceplanted. I was going to say "F*ck you" and "I will kill you". It came out as "I will f*ck you." He's still laughing. FML

by Ashley / 10/07/2013 at 2:11am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my laptop to I.T. to fix my internet. Only after I left did I realise my memory technique for remembering the stages of mitosis (Iraqi penis man anally transmits chlamydia) was left as a sticky note on my desktop. The guy definitely noticed. FML

by interphaseprophasemetaphase / 09/04/2013 at 7:18am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

by Anonymous / 09/03/2013 at 12:13am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML

by fsfs / 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm / Germany (Schleswig-Holstein) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came back from vacation only to find my 16-year-old son was throwing a party with over 30 kids in our house. My 33-year-old sister was having fun dancing on a table. FML

Today, I had to wake my mom up. While she was naked. On the toilet. FML

by 27161697 / 07/22/2013 at 12:45am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.