Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hazardoussmiles9

Online | Search for a member

hazardoussmiles9

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1078
  • Number of comments : 105
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About hazardoussmiles9 : Disregard my username, I hate it.

hazardoussmiles9's page activity

Visits<b>Trollx</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 2:18am<b>micassures</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 5:04pm<b>eaglerob</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:43pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:22pm<b>seeoseek</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 9:21pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 6:56am<b>Kamon97</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 8:33am<b>anj_marie</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 1:14am<b>jjmomo16</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 11:30pm<b>ckirksey</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 4:27pm<b>kalwalls</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 1:16pm<b>persianninja</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 12:29am<b>reallynow1910</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 5:38pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:22am<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:50am<b>SpunkyyyMonkeyy</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 1:46am<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 3:23pm<b>AnimeAddict95</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 7:47pm

Liked!<b>eaglerob</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 4:43am

hazardoussmiles9's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of hazardoussmiles9's badges

hazardoussmiles9's favorite FMLs

Today, I've been awake for nearly three days due to homework and my mom's wedding preparations, so I took some adderall to keep me awake at school. I took too much, totally zoned out in class, became hopelessly fascinated by my own hand, and was accused of doing drugs. FML

#20950229
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36212) - you deserved it (19766)

On 11/08/2013 at 12:43pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML

#20941762
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21419) - you deserved it (50220)

On 11/01/2013 at 7:55pm - health - by nl4 (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I decided to get over my lifelong fear of Michael Jackson. I went to have my photo taken with a statue of him. Little did I know, for Halloween week they replace the statues with real people. It jumped out at me; I'm never getting over this fear. FML

#20939955
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42404) - you deserved it (6619)

On 10/31/2013 at 4:41am - misc - by Shady_Soldier - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to try LSD with a few friends in a safe environment. As an artist, I had planned to spend my trip doing psychedelic paintings and had all my supplies set up. Apparently I spent most of my time in fetal position muttering about the "evil easel" and never even touched my canvas. FML

#20930479
334 comments

Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

#20930198
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38733) - you deserved it (11503)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27197) - you deserved it (39033)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I dreamt that I beat someone up for using Comic Sans in a project. Now I can't look at him without being irrationally angry. FML

#20914246
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32556) - you deserved it (6334)

On 10/09/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by Ellie (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I faceplanted. I was going to say "F*ck you" and "I will kill you". It came out as "I will f*ck you." He's still laughing. FML

#20910543
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43304) - you deserved it (7292)

On 10/07/2013 at 2:11am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I took my laptop to I.T. to fix my internet. Only after I left did I realise my memory technique for remembering the stages of mitosis (Iraqi penis man anally transmits chlamydia) was left as a sticky note on my desktop. The guy definitely noticed. FML

#20867249
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32924) - you deserved it (10343)

On 09/04/2013 at 7:18am - misc - by interphaseprophasemetaphase (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

#20865525
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41465) - you deserved it (4593)

On 09/03/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML

#20841635
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54801) - you deserved it (4578)

On 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by fsfs (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I came back from vacation only to find my 16-year-old son was throwing a party with over 30 kids in our house. My 33-year-old sister was having fun dancing on a table. FML

Today, I had to wake my mom up. While she was naked. On the toilet. FML

Today, I was on a bus and I was so exhausted that I fell asleep. According to a few other passengers, I nestled into the chest of the guy next to me, and hit him every time he made a noise. FML

#20795078
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41688) - you deserved it (9020)

On 07/21/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by accountnamevalid (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to break up a fist fight between two female residents. I work in a retirement home. FML

#20791178
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40700) - you deserved it (3020)

On 07/18/2013 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: