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hazard_havoc17

Offline (the 03/23/2014 at 3:20am) | Search for a member

hazard_havoc17

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 856
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About hazard_havoc17 : it's a bio what do you expect me to fuckin' put here?

hazard_havoc17's page activity

Visits<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 2:19pm<b>JohniF</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 9:20pm<b>scooter2011</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 9:39pm<b>german_boy97</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 1:01pm<b>Cherrylimes</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 1:18pm<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 12:46pm<b>Breezeblocks_</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 7:32pm<b>RainbowDashie140</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 12:17pm<b>xzeldax3</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 6:35am<b>messorix</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 2:44am<b>chargers2588</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 12:33pm<b>Oddyesy</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 3:13pm<b>olpally</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 5:09pm<b>ohaidereitszeex3</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 8:22am<b>edris_305</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 8:18am<b>hawright</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 10:34pm<b>isallwaysme</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 10:05pm<b>Fmlano</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 11:26am

hazard_havoc17's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of hazard_havoc17's badges

hazard_havoc17's favorite FMLs

Today, my lips were dry and chapped, so I asked if I could use some of my friend's chapstick. She didn't mind, so I quickly put some on. Only later did I notice that my lips were sparkly. Turns out it was glitter balm. Now everyone calls me "princess." FML

#21021931
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39445) - you deserved it (12370)

On 01/08/2014 at 10:23pm - misc - by chapstick (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30941) - you deserved it (14701)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

#20961988
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42721) - you deserved it (17412)

On 11/18/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by flavored (woman) - United States

Today, my mother kept nagging at me because my 9-month-old daughter only calms down when I play her metal. She demands I use gospel, otherwise she will turn into a "devil-worshipping lunatic like her mother". FML

#20915864
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41883) - you deserved it (4596)

On 10/10/2013 at 11:04pm - kids - by SlapAndTickle - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He told me he was a dinosaur. FML

#20883504
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42048) - you deserved it (5362)

On 09/16/2013 at 7:09am - love - by Kit (woman) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for years. There was just one problem: it was so terrible I said, "I think I might be straight" about five minutes in just so it would stop. FML

#20844009
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44960) - you deserved it (13868)

On 08/18/2013 at 11:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

#20837021
188 comments

Today, my house was broken into. After we called the police, my dad started calling himself Sherlock Holmes and talking in a British accent. He insists on calling me Watson. He is going around the neighborhood acting like Sherlock, investigating stuff. He won't stop. FML

Today, someone told me that my initials really fit my personality. I took it as a strange compliment, until I realized my initials spell "ew". FML

#20832005
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42717) - you deserved it (4087)

On 08/11/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by ew - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I actually had to explain to two of my friends that neither Alaska nor Nebraska are in Canada. I think I need new friends. FML

#20827400
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40925) - you deserved it (4855)

On 08/08/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by ROBERT (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was video chatting with my boyfriend and his friends. When I stood up, he told his friend "See, she's not a twig!" I jokingly replied with, "So I'm fat?" After a few seconds of silence, his friend yelled, "It's a trap!" and left the chat. FML

#20825004
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43819) - you deserved it (13871)

On 08/07/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by ImNotFat - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

#20824961
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47876) - you deserved it (23026)

On 08/07/2013 at 1:40am - animals - by Blood on my hands (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my surgeon if I would be having a general or local anesthetic at my upcoming operation. He replied, "General, of course! It's gonna be a slaughterhouse in there!" FML

#20824490
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40922) - you deserved it (3615) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/06/2013 at 5:59pm - health - by pong - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I was convinced by my friends to watch an episode of the American TV show "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo". They said it was bad, but I didn't anticipate having a full-blown panic attack ten minutes into it. FML

#20819060
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40298) - you deserved it (8813)

On 08/03/2013 at 5:57pm - health - by WTF, America? (man) - Sweden

Today, I was having dinner at a long-time friend's place. In a matter of 15 minutes, her mom had managed to establish unequivocally that three kinds of people were ruining the world: vegetarians, atheists and homosexuals. I'm all three rolled into one. She knows that. FML

#20804013
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44512) - you deserved it (14704)

On 07/26/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by WhyThankYou (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)



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