Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hand1234

Search for a member

hand1234
  • Town/Country : Ohio
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 14 June 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 161
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About hand1234 : Hey all you people my name is Kel I love One Direction ( Nialls my fav along with Liam) Katy Perry and Rascal Flats. I love to eat play guitar dance and practice on my drawing skills but yea this me thanks

hand1234's last visitors

mathenthebestintheworlwaffule365LilsbillsQQmoreitz_towelieSmashhoofVanillanougatklovemachineTrollx

hand1234's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of hand1234's badges

hand1234's favorite FMLs

Today, it's my Nana's birthday and to say she is having a good time is an understatement. She's so drunk, she took out her false teeth tried to put them in her dog's mouth. When she failed, she tried the cat's. FML

#11166958
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28734) - you deserved it (3651)

On 06/13/2010 at 10:36am - misc - by Cat (woman) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)

Today, I went downstairs after a family argument. The front door was kicked in, the sink faucet was snapped off, and there were broken plates all over the kitchen floor. I later found out that the argument was over who left the refrigerator door open. FML

#11017232
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25958) - you deserved it (1898)

On 06/06/2010 at 7:48pm - misc - by mark (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my house was the only house left that still had its Christmas lights up, so I decided to take them down. Almost done, my fingers brushed over a spiderweb. Startled, I jumped off the ladder and broke my shoulder. Oh, and the spider still managed to stay on my hand, giving me a panic attack. FML

#8716730
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19135) - you deserved it (6894)

On 02/28/2010 at 12:05pm - animals - by Man vs. Spider - United States

Today, I tried to see if you can kick yourself in the nuts. You can. FML

#8581671
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4729) - you deserved it (58198)

On 02/23/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by nutcracker (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, in a sporting goods store, my mom walked over to the other side of the store, when a cute guy came over to talk to me. When she saw this she grabbed a bat, walked over to us and said "If you ever even look at my daughter again, I will beat you shitless." She was serious. He ran. FML

#8354648
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24105) - you deserved it (1616)

On 02/16/2010 at 9:54pm - misc - by batter--up (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that while I was on vacation my neighbor had let my brother into my apartment. I don't have a brother. FML

#7203550
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28492) - you deserved it (1505)

On 01/07/2010 at 7:21pm - misc - by Darkness162000 - France

Today, I came home from a new years party wearing a shower curtain and nothing else. FML

#7079223
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5739) - you deserved it (33793)

On 01/01/2010 at 9:13am - misc - by NotANaturist (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I hit a deer. The worst part? Papa deer saw me hit mama deer, and proceded to ram into my car. FML

#6463128
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22865) - you deserved it (16596)

On 11/26/2009 at 2:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I got out of the shower to find my cat staring up at me. Apparently my swinging penis looks like a cat toy to her, so she jumped up and clawed and tried to bite it. FML

#5189788
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38256) - you deserved it (6385)

On 09/11/2009 at 4:46pm - animals - by ouchh (man) - United States (California)

Today, in Burger King, I was leaning against the railing looking at the menu. I saw an old man using the rail to walk, so I got out of the way. He ran his hand across my back and said "You're so cute, I'd like to take you home and lock you in my basement naked so you can't leave" and walked out. FML

#4696975
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56914) - you deserved it (3249)

On 08/21/2009 at 12:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I was home alone and I started to sing Halo by Beyonce. I was starting to get into it and began singing with more passion until the phone rang. It was my neighbor begging me to please shut the hell up. FML

#4582506
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11424) - you deserved it (29019)

On 08/16/2009 at 9:00pm - misc - by Ricky (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I planned a romantic dinner with rose petals, the whole lot, for my ex-girlfriend to win her back. When I took her to my house I told her to guess what I had planned, to which she replied "I hope it's not a stupid romantic dinner with rose petals and shit." FML

#3331987
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45532) - you deserved it (11605)

On 06/29/2009 at 2:31am - love - by ipopnlok (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was at the cafeteria of my school with my boyfriend and he dumped me. I was kinda expecting it. What I wasn't expecting was that he'd start running in front of everyone, screaming "FREEEEEEEEEDOM!" at the top of his lungs and that he'd kiss the first girl he saw. FML

#2822887
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81436) - you deserved it (9229)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:39am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: