hamusta

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hamusta

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1718
  • Number of comments : 52
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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hamusta's page activity

Visits<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 3:49am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 10:28am<b>VivaLaColdplay</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 2:57pm<b>Artigedude65</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 6:22am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 2:34am<b>taylorbrown97</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 12:33am<b>Darmera</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 10:40pm<b>12shadic12</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 10:37pm<b>Avi8r</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 8:11pm<b>Superwalkatural</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 7:53pm<b>Zatert</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 7:26pm<b>moochiemarie1978</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 2:02am<b>Lady_Comet</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 1:36am<b>kickazz16</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 3:45pm<b>oj101</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 2:01am<b>raphanne</b> - the 02/17/2012 at 9:46pm

Fucked!<b>Darmera</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 4:41am

hamusta's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of hamusta's badges

hamusta's favorite FMLs

Today, after two weeks of intense detective work, I found out my wife isn't cheating on me after all. She really has just been going out and playing table tennis with her friend like she said. Who the hell even plays table tennis? FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2016 at 8:40am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my religious dad caught my brother jerking off and decided to give us both a lecture about it. My brother ended up saying "If god doesn't want me to jerk off, how come he made my knob the perfect shape to fit in my hand?" I burst out laughing and now we're both grounded. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2016 at 4:38am / Intimacy

Today, my family and I finally moved out of our apartment, and into a more accommodating house. However, as we were leaving, my brother leans over and whispers in my ear, "I've masturbated in every room of that apartment, but it was the best in your room." We've lived there for 3 years. FML

by Rowaelin16 / 08/22/2016 at 10:50pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a cute guy at the coffee shop reading a book. Wanting to be friendly, I smiled as I approached and asked what he was reading. He returned the smile and said, "Minding your damn business, by Fuck Off." FML

by nevaagain / 08/19/2016 at 4:00pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, my house flooded. Hundreds of dollars worth of art supplies, multiple video game systems, academic awards from middle school, birthday cards from my deceased grandfather; it's all gone. What remained untouched? The cat's litter box, which somehow floated. FML.

Today, I went to the chiropractor for a check up. She was going through some of the ways to help my posture and mentioned something that I've never heard before. My fat ass thought it was a type of food. Turns out it was a sports routine. FML

by Epithymia / 08/15/2016 at 11:09am / United Kingdom (Leeds) / Health

Today, I told my best friend that I was gay and that I liked him. Turns out he's very open about the topic. Basically, he kissed me and then slapped me. I don't know what that's supposed to mean. FML

by 13a5ic H1p5t3r / 08/14/2016 at 11:58pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I got punched in the face after I beat my stepbrother at Mario Kart. I didn't really get hurt, but he managed to break a finger. My stepmom blamed the whole thing on me, accusing me of being violent and a bad influence on her son. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2016 at 10:19am / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left, I was carrying her downstairs and tripped. Try calling your parents from the hospital and explaining that their daughter, who can't even crawl yet, has a broken leg. FML

by ulrika / 07/23/2016 at 9:09pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML

by Anonymous / 07/23/2016 at 7:04pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my new girlfriend took me on a double date with her, her best friend and her best friend's new girlfriend. Which would have been fine, if her best friend's girlfriend wasn't my recent ex. The small world of a lesbian. FML

Today, my boyfriend wanted to get into an open relationship. He has no romantic feelings for me anymore, but he didn't want to separate from my cat. FML

by Katsura / 07/18/2016 at 8:43pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals

Today, I reassured a close friend that he could tell me anything. Now all our conversations are almost exclusively about his kinks. Did you know a well-stretched human anus can hold an entire bag of jumbo marshmallows? FML

Today, I was woken up by my dad and my dog barking at each other, and my dad yelling, "I am the Alpha male!" FML

by DumbassRoaster / 07/10/2016 at 3:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, after 3 days of interrupted sleep, I confronted my new neighbor about the noise his wife keeps making during their "private time". He then let me know the noise is actually from his daughter, who's mentally disabled and isn't taking the move well. FML

by Anonymous / 07/02/2016 at 12:17am / United States (California) / Kids