About gummibehrs : I dislike Nicolas Cage, Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, George Lopez, Eddie Murphy, David Hasselhoff, David Caruso, and Jim Belushi.
I have heterochromia. I also have random episodes of cardiac arrhythmia.
I model at a small local agency for fun.
I love to read, write stories, and draw.
I volunteer for Greenpeace and local animal shelters.
I babysit full-time for two families.
Someday I'd like to work for the Red Cross.
I think greediness and selfishness are the worst human traits.
"It takes both rain and sunshine to make a rainbow."
"Faith sees the invisible, believes the unbelievable, and receives the impossible."
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I had been working at the checkout for over 5 hours. Slighty tired while serving a customer, my eye accidentally twitched and I gave him a wink, he smiled and winked back. When I finished work 2 hours later he was outside, waiting for me, and followed me to my car, still smiling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40239) - you deserved it (2781)
On 09/03/2009 at 9:27am - work - by Pop_Pies (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I fell asleep during naptime. I'm the teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13791) - you deserved it (25802)
On 09/03/2009 at 1:05am - work - by yogabbagabba (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I wanted to make love with my boyfriend for the first time. I wanted everything to be perfect. The CD kept skipping, the rose petals had ants all over them, and he couldn't get it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42697) - you deserved it (9766)
On 09/02/2009 at 11:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while lifeguarding, I received six prank phone calls on the official pool phone. When it rang again, I picked it up, told them to go fuck themselves, hung up, and then left the phone off the hook. A second later, my cellphone rang. It was my boss, telling me to get a sense of humor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30196) - you deserved it (5663)
On 09/02/2009 at 9:18pm - work - by lifeguardfuckup (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I fell asleep in class. Usually, people just sit still when asleep. Nope, not me. Not only had I been violently rocking and nodding my head, the teacher stopped class for everyone to see for 5 minutes as she made jokes. What woke me? The intense laughter followed by embarrassment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15892) - you deserved it (22851)
On 09/02/2009 at 6:17pm - misc - by Math_Rocker (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was having lunch with my boyfriend and talking about how stressed out I've been because of my job. While I'm speaking, he pulls out his phone and says his boss is texting him and it was important. There was a game of Tetris reflecting onto his glasses from his phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37504) - you deserved it (5200)
On 09/02/2009 at 3:17pm - love - by littlemissignored (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my boss rang me for the 5th time on my day off. Frustrated I pushed 'ignore' and yelled a string of obscenities at my phone. Turns out I pushed 'talk'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9078) - you deserved it (39735)
On 09/02/2009 at 5:39am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Marlborough)
Today, my best friend thought it would be funny push me off my bike. He thought it was even funnier when the paramedic accidentally dropped me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37484) - you deserved it (1966)
On 09/01/2009 at 8:04pm - health - by Misterhippo (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was at the mall in a store looking at movie posters. I turned around and suddenly saw a creepy guy smiling at me, holding his arms out wide. I screamed "holy shit!" really loudly, causing everyone to stop and stare at me funny. Then I realized the creepy man was a cardboard cutout. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9510) - you deserved it (30772)
On 09/01/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by becca1417 (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I walked into the kitchen and saw a note my roomate posted. As I got close to read it I was attacked by a very pissed off cat. The note said "Left window open last night, stray cat got in. Watch out he isn't friendly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35041) - you deserved it (2108)
On 09/01/2009 at 2:51pm - animals - by Catscratch (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids. When we were on the Ferris wheel, I discovered my fear of heights. I hyperventilated, screamed from our seat "LET ME OUT! OH GOD LET ME OUT!!" I also began crying hysterically. They stopped the ride for me to get off. I'm a 45 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32999) - you deserved it (10892)
On 09/01/2009 at 2:30am - health - by pussyOUT (man) - United States
Today, I was in an unfamiliar building on campus and I needed to use the bathroom before class started. I walked in and saw a man at the sink. I said "Oh my god I'm sorry! I thought this was the women's washroom." It was. The very butch looking woman gave me a look of death. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32693) - you deserved it (7433)
On 08/31/2009 at 5:18pm - misc - by Cherie (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was at my only sister's wedding. She gave a speech about the person who means the most to her. She said, "She is my favorite sister who has always been there for me." Being her only sister, I got up to hug her. Turns out she was talking about her slutty sorority sister. Not me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43715) - you deserved it (2509)
On 08/31/2009 at 1:21pm - misc - by ohsugarxo (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was strolling past an old women when from behind she called "can you help me get the rest of the groceries out of the car?" I approached the car, and helped her un-load bags. She began hitting me, screaming "SOMEONE IS STEALING MY THINGS". She was actually asking her son in the car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32362) - you deserved it (4330)
On 08/30/2009 at 11:32pm - misc - by LGFLIPSTER (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to meet with my landlord to organise when he was coming to look at my flat and decide whether I get my deposit back. In the time it took to see him, my friend drank a bottle of vodka and vomited all over my room and knocked the window through. My landlord is coming in the morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24376) - you deserved it (3631)
On 08/30/2009 at 10:51pm - misc - by Robbins (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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