Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

gummibehrs

Search for a member

gummibehrs
  • Town/Country : Ireland
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 28 October 1989 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 4088
  • Number of comments : 402
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About gummibehrs : I dislike Nicolas Cage, Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, George Lopez, Eddie Murphy, David Hasselhoff, David Caruso, and Jim Belushi.
I have heterochromia. I also have random episodes of cardiac arrhythmia.
I model at a small local agency for fun.
I love to read, write stories, and draw.
I volunteer for Greenpeace and local animal shelters.
I babysit full-time for two families.
Someday I'd like to work for the Red Cross.
I think greediness and selfishness are the worst human traits.

"It takes both rain and sunshine to make a rainbow."

"Faith sees the invisible, believes the unbelievable, and receives the impossible."

gummibehrs's last visitors

Vball6Marceline_17WitchcraftoakeidoakeiFreezeObWanCanBlowMERiileyfinkplamingo

gummibehrs's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of gummibehrs's badges

gummibehrs's favorite FMLs

Today, I called a wrong number. Calling back the right person, I began a long story about how I'd just called the wrong number. It was the wrong number lady again. FML

#15429029
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9201) - you deserved it (25174)

On 03/22/2011 at 8:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30170) - you deserved it (24884)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, my dad cussed out an individual on the phone because he thought it was a telemarketer. He was my Indian girlfriend's father. FML

#15377212
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32564) - you deserved it (3402)

On 03/19/2011 at 1:37am - misc - by dollarstorepwnr (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML

#15079652
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16307) - you deserved it (24431)

On 02/22/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by CutieBooty (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Right before I was about to climax, he asks "Do you remember when you bought the homeless guy with one leg a hot dog?" FML

#14805791
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25133) - you deserved it (3281)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:17am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I spent all day handing out flyers advertising my services as a psychic. I got only one call. The caller wanted to inform me that I had misspelt the word "psychic" on my flyer. She was right. FML

#13610871
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4287) - you deserved it (26013)

On 10/27/2010 at 1:58am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was laughing at a story of a girl who had dropped her cellphone in a hottub and ruined it. As I was feeling pretty good about myself, I then realized that my cellphone was in the pocket of a sweater that I had just thrown in the washer 20 minutes prior. FML

#6365163
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3962) - you deserved it (30450)

On 11/19/2009 at 2:36am - misc - by Cellphonetroubles - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I learned that if you stare at your cat and her eyes suddenly get really big, it means she's going to maul your face. FML

#6355609
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11841) - you deserved it (20762)

On 11/18/2009 at 4:01pm - animals - by nycplywood (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was at a petting zoo with my boyfriend. A guy that worked there said he'd take a picture of me with a mouse on my head. He reassured me that this mouse was trained. I agreed. Once the mouse got on my head, it peed. Turns out the guy didn't work there after all. FML

#6212555
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20351) - you deserved it (10914)

On 11/08/2009 at 2:14pm - health - by Poopyhead (woman) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, it's Saturday night, and also Halloween. Instead of going out, I'm sitting at home on MSN telling everyone who asks me what I'm doing tonight that I'm 'going out in 10 minutes to a party', then when 10 minutes pass, I block them. FML

#6080955
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20747) - you deserved it (17894)

On 10/31/2009 at 6:08am - misc - by pathetic (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had lunch with some important potential clients at a fancy restaurant. I really wanted to make a good impression. When the piano music stopped, I started clapping while looking around for the pianist. Apparently, it was a CD. FML

#5953871
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7661) - you deserved it (25936)

On 10/23/2009 at 1:01am - work - by E.S. (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I discovered I was at the same restaurant as my ex and his new girlfriend. Quickly, I picked up my mother's phone when she wasn't looking, and began to pretend to talk to a fake new boyfriend. Few seconds later, the waiter loudly asked me if I was done talking into the calculator. FML

#5865096
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6530) - you deserved it (29513)

On 10/17/2009 at 12:25pm - love - by Ohgreat (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was playing FarmTown and got into a fight with a 14 year old boy. I threatened him with physical violence, and he reported me. I'm 23 years old and got banned from a virtual farming game for threatening children. FML

#5841852
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5224) - you deserved it (41315)

On 10/15/2009 at 1:04pm - kids - by hatelittleboys (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was listening to music, talking to a boy I like on MSN. He asked if I could share the song I was listening to, so I did. It wasn't until I had shared and fully transferred it did I realise it was actually the fake radio show I record on my own, in a phoney Australian accent. All 6 minutes of it. FML

#5830310
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5917) - you deserved it (23791)

On 10/14/2009 at 4:19pm - love - by LasagnaRawks (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I am in a very long line at the supermarket, gazing about in complete boredom when I spot a lady cradling what appears to be a cute newborn baby. Being enamored of all babies, I get off the line, go over and say "Oh, what a cute little baby!" The lady was holding a coconut. FML

#5762381
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6405) - you deserved it (36532)

On 10/10/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by BEE (woman) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Sharina's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! Glad to see you all again, hope you’re doing fine and dandy. We are, amazing stuff has happened in amongst all the drudge and sludge. We’ve spent the week listening to the greatest album ever…

Friday 24 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: