Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

guitaristcarts12

Search for a member

guitaristcarts12

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 16 March 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1043
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About guitaristcarts12 : My name is Chris and I have been playing guitar for 7 years

guitaristcarts12's page activity

Visits<b>Spookmeister</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 11:00pm<b>mLove395</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 6:39pm<b>JoshArson</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 6:30pm<b>troublsum</b> - the 04/24/2013 at 3:34pm<b>SilverPseudoKing</b> - the 01/21/2012 at 4:49pm<b>Constraint</b> - the 09/04/2010 at 6:59am<b>Misery_business</b> - the 09/12/2009 at 3:00pm<b>Daaniellee1234</b> - the 09/06/2009 at 5:14pm<b>youreawhore</b> - the 08/30/2009 at 8:56am<b>MissBunnyfufu</b> - the 08/01/2009 at 4:59pm<b>TiiNK3RB3LL</b> - the 07/21/2009 at 10:59pm<b>Booch43</b> - the 07/19/2009 at 2:27pm<b>Envy3</b> - the 06/06/2009 at 2:23am<b>shortshan</b> - the 06/03/2009 at 8:26pm<b>littlehowl</b> - the 06/03/2009 at 5:47pm<b>ilikeboys</b> - the 06/03/2009 at 10:16am<b>gabbagus</b> - the 06/03/2009 at 9:11am<b>colourmealy</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 8:51pm

guitaristcarts12's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

guitaristcarts12's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and his parents met my family. My grandpa thought it would be funny to walk around with a realistic gun and make references about being in the mafia. The rest of my family went along with it. FML

#4782445
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37506) - you deserved it (4823)

On 08/24/2009 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was camping. Me and this really cute girl were hitting it off real nice. It was the last night so we both headed over to my tent to have sex. I was just about to get it in when a raccoon ripped my tent causing the girl to scream and runaway. I got cockblocked by a raccoon. FML

#2729024
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70099) - you deserved it (8419)

On 06/08/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by Baggabbles123 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a dentist appointment. While waiting, I pulled out my Cosmo magazine to entertain myself. The woman sitting across from me points and tells me I'm reading "Satan's Manual." I told her I don't believe in Satan. She said, "You'll know he's real when you become his bitch!" FML

#2442070
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50607) - you deserved it (7555)

On 05/30/2009 at 7:22pm - misc - by satanlovesme (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I turned 30 years old. My dad, the only living relative I have, gave me a call. Not to wish me a happy birthday, but to tell me about "a hot piece of ass" he nailed at the senior center last night. FML

#2429850
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52827) - you deserved it (2624)

On 05/30/2009 at 11:18am - misc - by willieboom (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML

#2427571
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8873) - you deserved it (64454)

On 05/30/2009 at 8:48am - kids - by Jess (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I won $200 a contest at a bar. The manager took me to a vault where money collected from the strippers go into a pool. He told me that at least half of the bills were slid through a strippers butt crack so I was to "choose wisely". FML

#2427031
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41718) - you deserved it (8238)

On 05/30/2009 at 7:39am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. All of a sudden he jumped off of me, going "shit, shit!". Worried, i asked him what was wrong. He shouted "I forgot to set my TiVO!" FML

#709735
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (105634) - you deserved it (7806)

On 03/30/2009 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by Jenny (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1156087) - you deserved it (115849)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

#86179
745 comments

I agree, your life sucks (776038) - you deserved it (82751)

On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: