Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

gtdp38

Search for a member

gtdp38

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 22 March 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 786
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

gtdp38's page activity

Visits<b>watermelon1</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 10:05am<b>maddyharris97</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 11:50am<b>Misswildsides</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 9:04pm

gtdp38's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of gtdp38's badges

gtdp38's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband called me from the store, trying to decide whether or not to buy the new games console he's been wanting. I'd already purchased one and hid it, ready for Christmas Day. I couldn't talk him into not buying himself one. There goes a $500 surprise. FML

#20995972
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43158) - you deserved it (6245)

On 12/17/2013 at 4:17pm - money - by pissed (woman) - United States

Today, I caught a man standing on my porch, urinating on my house. I called the cops, who informed me that because my porch isn't fenced off, it's not trespassing, and because it's private property not visible from the street, the man wasn't urinating in public. FML

Today, I learned that just because you live on a different continent, it doesn't mean your mother won't come knocking when you are having sex. FML

#20989004
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53044) - you deserved it (4602)

On 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by hi Mum - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I saw the guy who helped me yesterday when I was lost by telling me which bus to take. He came up to me and asked me how it went. I told him that the bus went the exact opposite way I wanted to go. He laughed and said, "I know." FML

Today, my boyfriend came onto me in a romantic gesture. We ended up having sex, forgetting that the window repair guy was supposed to come today and do some work on our third floor apartment windows. I still don't know how much he saw. FML

#20939175
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42913) - you deserved it (13345)

On 10/30/2013 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by English_Nut117 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom got drunk at our family reunion and told everyone how worried she is that my "excessive masturbation" would damage the nerves in both my dick and arm. FML

#20939123
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46237) - you deserved it (7920)

On 10/30/2013 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by goodgrief (man) - United States (California)

Today, a radio show asked the question, "Where does the dentist live in Finding Nemo?" I called in and got through. When he asked me the question, instead of the actual answer I quickly gave out my own address over live radio. FML

#20939023
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36558) - you deserved it (17390)

On 10/30/2013 at 11:58am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I put a picture of my cat on Facebook. A stranger sent me a message saying how "attractive" she was and that her eyes are "very seductive". So, basically, someone is trying to hit on my cat. FML

#20938804
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40568) - you deserved it (4507)

On 10/30/2013 at 3:03am - animals - by meow (woman) - United States

Today, I found out my 13-year-old daughter thinks the showerhead got her pregnant. FML

Today, l grounded my 17-year-old son from his computer because of his terrible attitude towards his homework. As payback, he convinced my 5-year-old daughter that if she goes to sleep, she'll never wake up. I now have a hysterical and sleepless child to deal with. FML

Today, I got married. My husband and I had been waiting until marriage to have sex, and when the time came, we started to undress. As I took my bra off, his eyes glazed over, and he fainted. An hour later, all he could say was, "I don't think we're meant to be together." FML

#20936013
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64673) - you deserved it (8562)

On 10/27/2013 at 7:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I fell asleep while at the beach with friends. Someone thought it would be funny to put chunks of bread on and around my junk. Seagulls have sharp beaks. FML

#20920631
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39924) - you deserved it (4507)

On 10/14/2013 at 8:16pm - misc - by zzfreakshow (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realised I sweat so much that I won't be able to go without sticking super pads with wings to my shirt underarms everyday. It makes supermarket trips interesting. Especially as a man. FML

#20895380
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34711) - you deserved it (3430)

On 09/25/2013 at 6:37am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML

#20889434
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50120) - you deserved it (33797)

On 09/20/2013 at 9:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was asked by my neighbor to stop jogging in our neighborhood because he keeps catching his son whacking off while watching me. His son is 28 years old and still lives at home. I'm 18. FML

#20869383
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57505) - you deserved it (4117)

On 09/05/2013 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by whatjusthappened - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: