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Today, I have pink eye in both eyes, the stomach virus, and a cold. I'm also sitting at work because my boss "doesn't believe in sick days." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26095) - you deserved it (1493)
On 06/19/2013 at 1:23pm - health - by sicksicksick - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23889) - you deserved it (55979)
On 06/11/2013 at 11:06pm - intimacy - by instinct (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I took my pet rabbit to the vet because I had noticed his genitals looked swollen compared to my other rabbit's. It turns out he's just "gifted". The vet laughed at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37238) - you deserved it (5703)
On 06/11/2013 at 10:00am - animals - by Rjlup - United States (Colorado)
Today, my friend told me he had just robbed a bank and needed a place to hide. Thinking he was joking, I let him in so we could hang out. 15 minutes later, the cops storm into my apartment. Now I'm an accomplice in a crime I thought was a joke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50889) - you deserved it (13821)
On 06/10/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my co-workers figured out that I was in high school when my husband was in kindergarten. They won't stop calling me a "cougar". FML
I agree, your life sucks (26468) - you deserved it (40581)
On 06/10/2013 at 11:19pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend threw out my old voicemail recorder, thinking it was junk. My father passed away years ago. I kept a recording of the last voicemail he'd left me on it so I'd always remember his voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63121) - you deserved it (2924)
On 06/10/2013 at 7:35pm - misc - by Upset (woman) - United States
Today, after years of researching and saving money, I got a pet fox. I was able to enjoy the majesty of the animal for three hours before it burrowed under the fence and ran away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29515) - you deserved it (44552)
On 06/10/2013 at 2:01pm - animals - by SadFoxLady (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I began having a seizure during breakfast. My soon to be ex-wife laughed and filmed me with her phone while my stepson called an ambulance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55901) - you deserved it (3033)
On 06/08/2013 at 6:10am - misc - by annoymous - United States (California)
Today, I drove 2 hours to my sister's wedding, only to find out my invitation was sent to me by mistake. She had me kicked out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49897) - you deserved it (3736)
On 06/07/2013 at 8:16pm - misc - by hopeyoushityourintestinesout (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my fiancée told me that she wants us to have an open marriage. She reasons that since she doesn't equate sex with love, there's no logical reason for me to be against her having sex with other people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45434) - you deserved it (4115)
On 06/05/2013 at 4:40pm - love - by ApparentlyNotEno (man) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, after years of training and competing, I realized that the universe does not want me to play the piano. Not only do I have hands that can fit in toddler-sized gloves, my carpal tunnel is already to the point where I have to wear a brace at night, at the ripe old age of 14. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41656) - you deserved it (3580)
On 06/05/2013 at 12:33pm - misc - by prdp - United States
Today, my 6-year-old son was so angry at me for not buying him overpriced candy at the airport, that he told a security guard I had a machine gun in my suitcase. The interrogation was not pleasant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52831) - you deserved it (6377)
On 06/03/2013 at 5:16pm - kids - by VDM (man) - Sent from mobile version
Today, my dad watched his first Lord of the Rings marathon. Now he keeps randomly spouting lines from the movies, and thought it'd be funny to hide in my closet, just to jump out at me while screaming, "My precious!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (38634) - you deserved it (6231)
On 06/02/2013 at 6:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Thurrock)
Today, after a night of heavy drinking, I woke up handcuffed to my bed. My friends who are responsible for this think it's hilarious and claimed not to remember where they put the keys. They took pictures, then left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35520) - you deserved it (12894)
On 05/08/2013 at 7:05am - misc - by Sebastian20 (man) - Netherlands (Groningen)
Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44545) - you deserved it (9888)
On 05/08/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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