About growingupnextmon : just go here if your really that interested. www.myspace.com/joshua6789 . I'm finding myself becoming rapidly addicted to this site. Troublesome. Or alternatively if a person is desperate to talk to me just add me on Joshcahill77@hotmail.com and mention FML.
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growingupnextmon's favorite FMLs
Today, I got an email from the company that manages my cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML
by APetsPet / 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, I drove my cousin to her wedding. The photographer said I was too ugly for the official photos so they searched the crowd for a good looking guy to pose as the driver in my new car. No one in the crowd stopped to defend me. My mom told me it's my own fault. FML
by CapeRanger / 10/04/2009 at 2:13pm / South Africa (Limpopo) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/01/2009 at 1:56am / Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador) / Intimacy
by P0wned / 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm / France (Bretagne) / Love
Today, I was picking up my 10 year old step-son from the airport. He began screaming and crying saying that I wasn't his father. I ended up sitting in a holding room because the security guards thought I was kidnapping him. My wife thought it was hilarious. FML
by justgreat / 09/28/2009 at 11:13am / United States (Virginia) / Kids
by ripfluffy / 09/28/2009 at 3:15am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous
Today, I missed my bus by a minute. I called up my step dad asking him if he can drive me because I had a test first period. After about calling him twenty times, and him not picking up, I see him drive by the bus stop pointing at me and laughing hysterically. FML
by NotFunny / 09/24/2009 at 3:44pm / United States (New York) / Transportation
Today, I was home alone, and decided to do some naked cleaning just because I could. After half an hour of liberating nakie-dusting, I turn around to see my boyfriend and his best friend gaping at me open mouthed. His older brother however gave a creepy smile and the thumbs up. FML
by DusterOverBits / 09/23/2009 at 5:35am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by Cpt_Concerned / 09/22/2009 at 12:37am / Canada (Alberta) / Health
by dreamdude / 09/20/2009 at 9:21am / United States (Connecticut) / Love
Today, I wasn't feeling too good, and took my temperature. I had a fever, which I told my boyfriend who was laughing hysterically when I told him. I asked him what was so funny, turns out he's been using the thermometer to take our dog's temperature sometimes. Rectally, of course. FML
by cl512 / 09/18/2009 at 9:33am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I urgently needed to use the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. When I went to flush, it would not go down the pipes. After about ten panic filled minutes, I notice the cat litter box. I carefully scoop out my logs, and bury them in the cat litter. FML
by Poowee / 09/18/2009 at 12:29am / United States (Alabama) / Animals
Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML
by sara / 09/17/2009 at 5:17pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got my wisdom teeth pulled. Apparently the medicines don't work on me. I woke up in the middle of the surgery and felt EVERYTHING. One of the nurses asked if I was okay, and the doctor just kept saying "Don't worry she's just dreaming", while tears were pouring down my face. FML
by NoPainNoGain / 09/17/2009 at 10:31am / United States (California) / Health
- Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I… Today, I was in the basement at my grandma's house. The bathroom is on the ground floor and there's… Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating…