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greeneye

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greeneye
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 16 September 1987 (26 years)
  • Number of visits : 17605
  • Number of comments : 488
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 24 posted

About greeneye : Me in Halloween costume. Boo.

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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greeneye's favorite FMLs

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16234) - you deserved it (1712)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I discovered that my abusive, obsessive, psychotic ex-boyfriend from over two years ago still has a thing for me. How did I find out? Although I've ignored him walking unnecessarily past my house for the past two months, it was hard to ignore when he fell from a tree outside my window. FML

#8704782
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32337) - you deserved it (2283)

On 02/27/2010 at 11:30pm - love - by sacrophage (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML

#7420693
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46045) - you deserved it (7424)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was at the movie theatre. I went to the bathroom, and was about to wipe my butt when I realized that where the toilet-paper dispenser should have been, there was a large hole. The woman in the next stall waved. FML

#7309178
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25494) - you deserved it (4747)

On 01/12/2010 at 9:57pm - misc - by pass_the_tp (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a placement test for the new college I am going to. After the test and picking up a few numbers, I left with great pride. I opened the door and started walking out. I then realized that I had walked into the closet. FML

#6632044
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8254) - you deserved it (21551)

On 12/06/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by Wrongdoor (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at a party where I ate bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

#6298765
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16743) - you deserved it (29753)

On 11/14/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by swedishdude (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I retook my ACT. I have been fighting a cold all week and have been very sneezy lately. Midway through the test, I got the urge to sneeze. Since it was very quiet and I didn't want to disturb the peace, I tried to hold my sneeze in. I ended up letting out a huge fart instead. FML

#5672838
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31491) - you deserved it (8637)

On 10/05/2009 at 10:21pm - misc - by Sneezy123 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was cutting the grass when I saw a man staring at me from my neighbor's garage. This went on for 5 minutes until I finally yelled 'hello'. There was no response, and I was creeped out, so I called my neighbor. It was a life-sized Paul McCartney cutout. FML

#5073384
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9359) - you deserved it (29738)

On 09/06/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by cachow (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went para sailing for the first time ever. My friends thought it would be funny to pull down my trunks right before my feet left the boat. I dangled there in the air for the whole resort to see. And I lost my shorts in the ocean. FML

#5039169
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37988) - you deserved it (2800)

On 09/04/2009 at 10:50am - misc - by no_hullabalo (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-wan)

Today, while giving a lecture about gases to a large chemistry class, I went outside to let loose an unusualy loud fart while they took some notes. I came back in only to see 300 students dying of laughter. I had left the wireless mic on. FML

#5033555
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13159) - you deserved it (40034)

On 09/04/2009 at 12:30am - work - by DrGas (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my son hit my husband's shop-vac while pulling into the garage too fast. He was grounded for 3 days. Later, while trying to demonstrate how to park safely, I hit my husband in his happy sacks with the mirror. FML

#4764613
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6988) - you deserved it (32938)

On 08/23/2009 at 7:00pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, when we change positions, he shouts: "Power Rangers - Transform!" FML

#4636801
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54820) - you deserved it (10823)

On 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I asked my aunt to pluck my eyebrows since hers are perfectly done. What I didn't know is she gets hers professionally shaped and she doesn't know how to shape eyebrows. I now look like a surprised Vulcan. FML

#4606857
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32154) - you deserved it (18793)

On 08/17/2009 at 6:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

#4525246
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57153) - you deserved it (6893)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)



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