greeneye

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Offline (the 06/03/2014 at 12:21am)

greeneye

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 16 September 1987 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 18757
  • Number of comments : 488
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 24 posted

About greeneye : Me in Halloween costume. Boo.

greeneye's page activity

Visits<b>LaprasTV</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 4:49am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 11:49am<b>chicken_dip</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 1:43pm<b>tikatica</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 7:23pm<b>pokemyeyes</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 1:45pm<b>gdeekay</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 11:59am<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 1:57am<b>10220706</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 1:04am<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 10:50pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 4:00am<b>Oihana</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 5:22pm<b>abby1212</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 11:56am<b>gqlmno</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 11:47pm<b>trenee1032</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 10:47pm<b>mds9986</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 12:48pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 12:10pm<b>dblogic</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 1:23pm<b>lovebugs7204</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 7:30am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 2:07pm<b>FlutterLoud</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 8:17pm

greeneye's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of greeneye's badges

greeneye's favorite FMLs

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

by Al / 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that my abusive, obsessive, psychotic ex-boyfriend from over two years ago still has a thing for me. How did I find out? Although I've ignored him walking unnecessarily past my house for the past two months, it was hard to ignore when he fell from a tree outside my window. FML

by sacrophage / 02/27/2010 at 11:30pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML

by Jon / 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the movie theatre. I went to the bathroom, and was about to wipe my butt when I realized that where the toilet-paper dispenser should have been, there was a large hole. The woman in the next stall waved. FML

by pass_the_tp / 01/12/2010 at 9:57pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a placement test for the new college I am going to. After the test and picking up a few numbers, I left with great pride. I opened the door and started walking out. I then realized that I had walked into the closet. FML

by Wrongdoor / 12/06/2009 at 9:58am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

by swedishdude / 11/14/2009 at 8:37am / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I retook my ACT. I have been fighting a cold all week and have been very sneezy lately. Midway through the test, I got the urge to sneeze. Since it was very quiet and I didn't want to disturb the peace, I tried to hold my sneeze in. I ended up letting out a huge fart instead. FML

by Sneezy123 / 10/05/2009 at 10:21pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cutting the grass when I saw a man staring at me from my neighbor's garage. This went on for 5 minutes until I finally yelled 'hello'. There was no response, and I was creeped out, so I called my neighbor. It was a life-sized Paul McCartney cutout. FML

by cachow / 09/06/2009 at 12:35am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went para sailing for the first time ever. My friends thought it would be funny to pull down my trunks right before my feet left the boat. I dangled there in the air for the whole resort to see. And I lost my shorts in the ocean. FML

by no_hullabalo / 09/04/2009 at 10:50am / Taiwan (T'ai-wan) / Miscellaneous

Today, while giving a lecture about gases to a large chemistry class, I went outside to let loose an unusualy loud fart while they took some notes. I came back in only to see 300 students dying of laughter. I had left the wireless mic on. FML

by DrGas / 09/04/2009 at 12:30am / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, my son hit my husband's shop-vac while pulling into the garage too fast. He was grounded for 3 days. Later, while trying to demonstrate how to park safely, I hit my husband in his happy sacks with the mirror. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2009 at 7:00pm / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, I saw a video of myself filmed last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming, "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" while naked. FML

by ShiriSarah / 08/20/2009 at 10:39am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, while we changed positions, he shouts, "Power Rangers - It's Morphin' Time!" FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my aunt to pluck my eyebrows since hers are perfectly done. What I didn't know is she gets hers professionally shaped and she doesn't know how to shape eyebrows. I now look like a surprised Vulcan. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2009 at 6:11pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

by ohgod / 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Iowa) / Kids