goonie85

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goonie85

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Saturday 29 June 1985 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2001
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About goonie85 : I don't know how to say this, but I'm kind of a big deal. I enjoy video games, my job, my family, and appreciate everything I've worked hard for. I also COMPLETELY understand needing to vent about a bad day!!!

goonie85's page activity

Visits<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:14pm<b>tyler_the_asiann</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 9:06pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 8:25am<b>Sphericity</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 12:19am<b>nataliewby</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 11:57am<b>ashearp99</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 7:05pm<b>thedeadmen</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 7:00am<b>Furby94</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 11:26pm<b>Gunnie</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 2:21pm<b>Ismellpurple</b> - the 04/26/2013 at 12:37pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 7:13am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 08/07/2010 at 12:30pm<b>MzMegs</b> - the 08/04/2010 at 1:41am<b>FoxOnTheStreet</b> - the 08/03/2010 at 3:35pm<b>penguinazul</b> - the 08/03/2010 at 1:48pm<b>UncleverName_FYL</b> - the 06/25/2010 at 6:03pm<b>Wolf88</b> - the 06/22/2010 at 10:37am<b>perdix</b> - the 06/11/2010 at 8:15pm

goonie85's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

goonie85's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a panic attack because my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to choke me in the middle of sex. FML

by Anonymous / 01/09/2011 at 10:03pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my mother told me to 'quit having a pity party'. I was just diagnosed with depression. I've lost my boyfriend, my job, my academic standing, and I just got rejected from every graduate school I applied for. And my mother thinks I'm a cry baby. Great. FML

by depressednupset / 12/30/2010 at 10:06am / United States (New Hampshire) / Health

Today, the girl I have been dating for the past couple months broke it off with me. She said she's tired of waiting around for me and being ignored in the mean time. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been so greedy as to finish my 2 degrees and work 2 jobs to pay for my school. How selfish of me. FML

by Lonely / 03/18/2010 at 12:02am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, after confronting my husband about lack of intimacy in our marriage, I found him playing with himself. His response to my shock was ‘This is less work and less involving.’ FML

by Anonymous / 03/15/2010 at 10:05am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Intimacy

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!". He then started singing the Super Mario Brother's theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML

by Anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 10:09pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, after finishing the laundry, I took clothes out of the dryer and took a big whiff of their delicious clean scent. That was when I noticed that my mom was watching me, and I had just smelled my dad's still-stained underwear that was on top. FML

by smellsgood / 03/13/2010 at 2:32pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered my mom had sold all of our summer clothes over the winter on eBay because we're short on cash. However, I am allowed to cut off the sleeves of all my long sleeve shirts and the legs off my jeans to stay cool in the summer. Nothing's more attractive than looking trashy, right? FML

by Nicole / 03/13/2010 at 2:16pm / United States (Texas) / Money

Today, I spent all day and last night in the bathroom. The seafood I'd been keeping in the refrigerator apparently had gone bad, and is now intent on finding its every possible route to the Great Porcelain Whirlpool. FML

by Anonymous / 03/12/2010 at 4:44pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Health

Today, my dog managed to get into our cabinet and eat an entire bag of hershey kisses. Now she is puking all over the house and outside too. When I called the vet to tell her about it, she said that it was normal, and to call her back when it was "coming out the other end." FML

by Anonymous / 03/12/2010 at 7:01am / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, I had a strong feeling that someone was watching me as I was undressing to get ready for bed. I conspicuously moved to the door and threw it open to find my step-brother clearly spying on me. We are the same age, live in the same house three weeks a month and in the same English class. FML

by meowtickmeow / 03/11/2010 at 8:18pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I posted a pic of my prom dress on facebook. The dress looked amazing on me and it just felt so right. So I spent every single dollar I had and some borrowed to buy the dress. When I logged on later that night, the first comment asked "Is this a joke?" FML

by yayaimannoying / 03/08/2010 at 8:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years left me because apparently I'm "too beautiful and he can no longer handle other guys always trying to flirt with me." FML

by dead / 03/08/2010 at 7:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I moved into my aunt's house. She had a little too much fun in the sixties and now tells everyone about her many imagined conquests, including her church minister and several has-been celebrities. As a plus, I discovered she has a habit of wandering around the house in the nude. FML

by Kristopher / 03/08/2010 at 2:31pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my husband of 10 years has a online blog. Excited to read about myself, I began skimming, only to find out that every entry is him explaining how he let his "soulmate" walk away 9 years ago because of his "previous commitment" and how he regrets it every day. FML

by smashleighfig / 03/08/2010 at 12:14am / Love

Today, I was walking through the mall with my husband. We came across a guy who was selling some weight loss pills. He tried to sell me some and I kindly declined. He told me not to deny my weight problems. Thanks. I'm 7 months pregnant. FML

by KateD / 03/06/2010 at 12:16am / United States (Illinois) / Health