About gonzolove : I made this account so I could reply to other people's nonsensical ramblings.
Also, I like to argue. And play devil's advocate.
And I own a lot of guns.
I also think that it's creepy that FML knows which day of the week I was born on.
About me? Well I'm into biology. I am going to school to pursue a career in microbial genetics. I drink beer. I don't take myself that seriously. I love music and dancing. I also try my hand at photography (black and white and I attempt to develop my own photographs).
Want more? Probably not. But if you do, message me. I will eventually get back to you (usually it will be pretty quick).
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should to relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31949) - you deserved it (7420)
On 09/17/2009 at 5:17pm - misc - by sara (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6479) - you deserved it (79354)
On 09/16/2009 at 1:05pm - kids - by Mac - Sent from mobile version
Today, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. At least, I thought I did, until I woke up to my pants, sheets, and boyfriend all soaking wet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30615) - you deserved it (5698)
On 09/10/2009 at 1:32am - misc - by Embarassed (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mom found a new favorite game. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of a year and still have not been able to find a job (months after graduating college). Due to this stress I cry easily, her game? Seeing how many times a day she can make me boo-hoo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26193) - you deserved it (6351)
On 09/09/2009 at 6:53pm - misc - by sadchick (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I hired a private investigator to find out if my wife of 15 years is cheating on me with my brother. I don't know what's worse, that she is cheating on me, or that instead of cheating with my brother she's cheating with my brother's wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47142) - you deserved it (3891)
On 09/09/2009 at 5:20pm - love - by nick2.0 (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I woke up to my 8 month old son happy as can be. I could hear him laughing over the monitor. When I walked into the room, he had somehow got his diaper off and was holding onto his new found penis. He thought it was hysterical when it went off and shot urine everywhere. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32585) - you deserved it (3464)
On 09/09/2009 at 3:33pm - kids - by WOCOACH (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML
I agree, your life sucks (136880) - you deserved it (10971)
On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I ran into my parents bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door my parents were on top of each other laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47744) - you deserved it (2176)
On 09/07/2009 at 5:20pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45351) - you deserved it (6400)
On 09/07/2009 at 9:32am - love - by GasAttack (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got my renewed driver's license. It clearly indicates 'Sex: F'. My beard and penis beg to differ. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38333) - you deserved it (2614)
On 09/06/2009 at 1:10pm - misc - by HeShe (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, knowing that the girl I broke up with last night goes crazy after breakups, I threw away my hair products, thinking she switched them with Nair. She didn't... but she did use the key I keep under a flowerpot to take all of my clothes and burn them on my lawn while I was at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32447) - you deserved it (6114)
On 09/05/2009 at 7:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I was awakened by the sound of chain-saws. Moments later a tree branch came through my roof. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36817) - you deserved it (1323)
On 09/04/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by 1ndustrytx (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was at work. I'm a sign spinner. Lots of other employees shares stories of how they have been flashed by 18 year old hot chicks as they drive by. I got flashed by a 45 year old, 300lbs lady. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31722) - you deserved it (3717)
On 09/01/2009 at 7:44am - work - by spinner (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids. When we were on the Ferris wheel, I discovered my fear of heights. I hyperventilated, screamed from our seat "LET ME OUT! OH GOD LET ME OUT!!" I also began crying hysterically. They stopped the ride for me to get off. I'm a 45 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33001) - you deserved it (10892)
On 09/01/2009 at 2:30am - health - by pussyOUT (man) - United States
Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML
I agree, your life sucks (74213) - you deserved it (3633)
On 08/31/2009 at 6:05pm - kids - by beya (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
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