Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

golferman72

Online | Search for a member

golferman72

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5772
  • Number of comments : 76
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About golferman72 : I read FML every day when I am bored

golferman72's page activity

Visits<b>lebanesebarbie</b> - 23 hours ago<b>SnowFangedBeauty</b> - yesterday at 4:09am<b>Driving_Gaming</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 4:44pm<b>em_kidds</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:03pm<b>noelsom7</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 1:51pm<b>stephanieeee95</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 12:40am<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 10:49pm<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 6:56pm<b>cecesavannah2015</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 6:09pm<b>hater4lizife</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 8:20pm<b>speakfreely</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 10:20am<b>imasexyburrito</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:01pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 7:05pm<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 5:18am<b>AhoyCaptian</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:15pm<b>dantee2005</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 2:42pm<b>william16</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 12:59am<b>trisshpham</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 11:28pm

Fucked!<b>SnowFangedBeauty</b> - yesterday at 10:07am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 3:37am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 9:16pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 11:31pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 11:21pm<b>Miranda_F</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 3:55am

golferman72's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of golferman72's badges

golferman72's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband told me that occasionally I pick my nose while I sleep. I didn't believe him so he showed me the video he took of it. He wants to post it on Facebook. FML

#19995801
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23128) - you deserved it (3025)

On 08/01/2012 at 1:44am - misc - by Emily (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59262) - you deserved it (10969)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, my OCD boyfriend stopped mid-way through sex just to crack all ten of his knuckles after accidentally cracking one. FML

#19990567
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28036) - you deserved it (4360)

On 07/29/2012 at 9:34am - intimacy - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a homeless lady decided she needed to change underwear in the middle of the sidewalk. I turned around just in time to see her legs in the air with no undies on. I can never eat salami again. FML

#19988661
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22145) - you deserved it (2227)

On 07/28/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by em from Cali - United States (California)

Today, while in the store with my kids, they wanted to buy tampons because I am "getting cranky, and it should be that time of the month." FML

#19988318
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10715) - you deserved it (20103)

On 07/28/2012 at 12:17am - kids - by love_to_live - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I finally got to see my boyfriend, after two months apart. As we hugged, he lifted me up and spun me around like in the movies. It would have been really romantic if I hadn't hit a little boy while he was riding past on his bike. I've just traumatized a little kid. FML

#19981666
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23374) - you deserved it (2538)

On 07/24/2012 at 2:33pm - kids - by Jessi (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, on my way to work, I noticed a woman on the side of the road waving for help, her car appearing to be broken down. I pulled over, stepped out of my car, went over to her car, lifted the hood, and checked it. When I looked up to tell her what was wrong, she and my car were gone. FML

#19980776
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30159) - you deserved it (7407)

On 07/24/2012 at 1:04am - misc - by Joey - United States (Florida)

Today, the man I went on a date with a few weeks ago finally called me back. I was his "one phone call" from prison. FML

#19980162
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22039) - you deserved it (2099)

On 07/23/2012 at 7:06pm - love - by Rose (woman) - United States

Today, I went to buy some beer using my fake ID, when the cute cashier and I started flirting. When he asked me how old I was, I said without thinking, "Nineteen." FML

#19979933
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6796) - you deserved it (56166)

On 07/23/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my neighbor called me on vacation to tell me that she let my mother into my house to feed my fish. I don't have fish, and my mother passed away 3 years ago. FML

#19978365
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33638) - you deserved it (2281)

On 07/22/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by My_Name_Is_Zach -

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my sister, but they already knew each other from my sister's work. She's an exotic dancer. FML

#19966736
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25607) - you deserved it (2456)

On 07/21/2012 at 2:18am - misc - by Closingwild - Mexico (Jalisco)

Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML

#19962934
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19245) - you deserved it (28010)

On 07/20/2012 at 6:20am - kids - by great - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11484) - you deserved it (38312)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I finally realized how depressed I am when I found bubble wrap and didn't feel like popping it. FML

#19957944
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31676) - you deserved it (2534)

On 07/19/2012 at 5:01am - health - by Epiphany (man) - United States

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

#19949637
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12229) - you deserved it (40212)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: