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golfer_boi

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golfer_boi

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 November 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2853
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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golfer_boi's favorite FMLs

Today, after 3 nights of insomnia, I was finally able to doze off. My boyfriend woke me up just to ask which soda in the fridge was mine. FML

#20062839
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21854) - you deserved it (1720)

On 09/08/2012 at 5:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, after years of bad blood, my husband decided to invite his parents to dinner. After making rude remarks about my pregnancy, his dad eventually muttered that I'm a slut. My husband punched him, his wife called the police, and now I'm all alone while he sits in a jail cell for battery. FML

#20030486
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27502) - you deserved it (1594)

On 08/19/2012 at 7:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

#20015702
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31140) - you deserved it (8577)

On 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by diggingaplotforone - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that when a cyclist tears down the street, slaps you across the face as he passes, looks back laughing and flips you off, then crashes into a lamppost, he'll still blame you and threaten to sue, even after you rush over to check his injuries. FML

#20014116
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30706) - you deserved it (2120)

On 08/10/2012 at 8:45pm - health - by dumbasdogshit (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my new boss, the CEO's son, finally showed up for work, three days late and right after lunch break. His first order of business was to call a meeting and scream at everyone for not having a diet latte waiting for him on his desk. God help us all. FML

#20013987
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27445) - you deserved it (1421)

On 08/10/2012 at 7:16pm - work - by SHIIIIITTTT (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend's parents took pictures of my tattoos to make sure I'm "not affiliated with any gangs." I have never even been arrested. FML

#20005337
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19000) - you deserved it (3642)

On 08/06/2012 at 4:13am - love - by awkwardparents - United States (California)

Today, I went to buy some beer using my fake ID, when the cute cashier and I started flirting. When he asked me how old I was, I said without thinking, "Nineteen." FML

#19979933
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6298) - you deserved it (53875)

On 07/23/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I sold yet another £100 bottle of lotion to a stuck-up teenage fashionista with less brain-power than the yapping bastard of a dog she carried in her arms. She did nothing but brag the whole time about her jewelry, and openly mocked me for only making minimum wage. FML

#19933084
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25890) - you deserved it (2375)

On 07/13/2012 at 3:08pm - work - by fucking pissants (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was watching a movie alone, after receiving a text from my boyfriend saying that his grandma was at the hospital, so he couldn't go with me. I caught him on a date with another girl, at the same movie screening that I went to. FML

#19843543
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36343) - you deserved it (2148)

On 06/25/2012 at 4:32am - love - by singlesummer - United States (California)

Today, my husband put some photos of our wedding on Facebook. He named the album "FML". FML

#19832174
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29156) - you deserved it (3062)

On 06/23/2012 at 1:17am - misc - by blah56 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my mom reached the lowest point of her midlife crisis. She convinced herself she's psychic and grounded me for something she "knows" I'm going to do. FML

#19832041
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24541) - you deserved it (1607)

On 06/23/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Coffee Boy - United States (Missouri)

Today, I met my biological parents for the first time. Their justification for giving me up for adoption was that I wasn't conceived at the ideal time for them. Apparently, the ideal time was six months after the adoption, when they conceived the first of my two brothers. FML

#19830019
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30014) - you deserved it (1881)

On 06/22/2012 at 5:13pm - kids - by pon-3 (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I found out that the only reason why I haven't had a relationship last for more than a week the past 4 years is because of my stalker ex-girlfriend, who has been keeping other women out of my life by making up horrible stories about me. She broke up with me 5 years ago. FML

#19804016
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27474) - you deserved it (1908)

On 06/17/2012 at 9:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realised that my boyfriend calls me "bitch" more often than he calls me by my actual name. FML



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