golfer_boi

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golfer_boi

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 November 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6611
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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golfer_boi's page activity

Visits<b>Crystal55621</b> - the 11/24/2016 at 12:24pm<b>coops456</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 11:21pm<b>Sharkthedark</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 11:34pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 2:02pm<b>bluestrawberry17</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 12:03am<b>markcallanan_</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 4:25pm<b>Wayne71</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 9:47pm<b>hedgehog42</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 5:27pm<b>suicidalchick</b> - the 04/19/2013 at 12:01am<b>REFF</b> - the 03/22/2013 at 2:58am<b>FMLsOhilarious</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 3:29pm<b>meherm</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 8:45pm<b>soccerfan10</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 11:50am<b>Stealth05</b> - the 02/20/2013 at 5:56pm<b>JesusPiece</b> - the 02/18/2013 at 9:05am<b>taylav</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 12:26pm<b>wilwonks</b> - the 02/12/2013 at 8:29am<b>arleenxo</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 10:03pm

golfer_boi's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of golfer_boi's badges

golfer_boi's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a missed call from my dad, who hasn't talked to me in months and has vowed not to have anything to do with me. I called him back excitedly and apologized for missing his call, and we had a 20-second conversation about how his phone accidentally dialed my number. FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2009 at 2:48pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a text from my girlfriend that she was tanning naked. I replied saying I wished I was there to make tanning more fun. She replied saying that its ok because Kevin was there. My girlfriend was tanning naked with another guy over. FML

by Geewizz / 04/05/2009 at 4:35am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I set my AIM status to be the currently-playing file on my iTunes. I've downloaded a lot of porn to my iTunes, and I wanted to watch some. My status changed to "Girl in Latex gets fucked in the ass." FML

by ohshittttttt / 04/04/2009 at 12:15pm / United States (New York) / Geek

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I went to Starbucks to get coffee. The employees told me that there was no more coffee. I started cursing at them and told them that I am in a really big hurry, and that I need coffee every day. They had been yelling back the whole time. Little did I realize, they were saying April Fool's. FML

by lisa321 / 04/01/2009 at 10:36pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on a first date with a girl at the movies. Trying to be polite, I held in a fart until an intense, loud action scene came on. As soon as I let go, the scene went silent and my fart was clearly heard to everyone in the movie theatre. My date went to the bathroom. She didn't come back. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 2:50pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 years old to run to the store. She didnt want to but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML

by badmom / 03/27/2009 at 2:42pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking the metro into DC for my internship. Two guys came in and started talking to each other in Arabic. One boy turned to the other said "Do you think shes cute?" The other responded "Her face is hideous but she has nice tits." I am fluent in Arabic. They were looking at me. FML

by sweet / 03/26/2009 at 2:08pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Love

Today, my girlfriend came up to me and told me we would never do anything sexual in our relationship. She said I was too adorable to take seriously in bed. FML

by Anonymous / 03/26/2009 at 12:36pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my mom told me she spent $760 on "quantum pendants" that "produce scalar energy that helps to enhance the body’s biofield." When I told her she got scammed, she denied it and yelled at me. Best part? She frequently lectures me about how I waste my money and spend irresponsibly. FML

by Anonymous / 03/26/2009 at 1:06am / Canada (British Columbia) / Money

Today, I was taking the bus home from work. As I was getting off an old man whistled at me, I told him to go to hell and got off the bus. When the bus drove away the old man stood in the back of the bus, holding up the wallet I left that he was trying to give to me. FML

by lily / 03/23/2009 at 11:46am / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 12:46am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I turned 22, without anyone wishing me a happy birthday. In fact, the only phone call I received all day was from my brother. He wanted to borrow money. FML

by Ondskansgris / 03/12/2009 at 5:59am / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one smallest penis I have ever seen." FML

by Noname / 03/11/2009 at 4:29pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy