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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I got shoved into a wall and pickpocketed. I was already in a bad mood from being dumped, so I chased the guy, tackled him so hard he was knocked out. As I retrieved my things, the police arrested me and apparently the robber was the cop's son, and didn't believe my statement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52330) - you deserved it (2210)
On 09/04/2009 at 10:14am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was at my only sister's wedding. She gave a speech about the person who means the most to her. She said, "She is my favorite sister who has always been there for me." Being her only sister, I got up to hug her. Turns out she was talking about her slutty sorority sister. Not me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43801) - you deserved it (2511)
On 08/31/2009 at 1:21pm - misc - by ohsugarxo (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, whilst on a date I recieved my sixth missed call from my mother. I excused myself and went outside and called her, she and my father wanted to know why I was having dinner and holding hands with another man. It turns out they were also on a date. At the same place. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36634) - you deserved it (8655)
On 08/31/2009 at 9:54am - love - by crawfo (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I went to this meditation center which my mom suggested to get mental peace as I have been hating my job and life for some time now. I drove for an hour and then walked around in scorching Indian sun for 2 hours trying to locate the damn place. I got lost and returned home angrier than ever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25640) - you deserved it (5156)
On 08/23/2009 at 2:33pm - misc - by zboy_123 (man) - India (Haryana)
Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14712) - you deserved it (34430)
On 08/20/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my wife decided she didn't want to lose weight with me. We were trying to decide on a reward for each pound lost. I suggested sex as the reward. She felt it wasn't fair to punish her just because I lost weight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41294) - you deserved it (5664)
On 08/14/2009 at 11:53am - intimacy - by seeminglyunsexy (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I went to the eye doctor. He tells me that I've developed a severe allergy to contact lenses and must stop wearing them immediately. It wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't just visited him a week earlier, paid for a new prescription and ordered a year's worth of brand new lenses. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33064) - you deserved it (2642)
On 08/13/2009 at 7:14pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I learned that a spontaneous romantic gesture of arriving home early with flowers and wine is not welcome when your wife is busy having sex with your brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (97023) - you deserved it (3059)
On 08/05/2009 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I learned that a spontaneous romantic gesture of arriving home early with flowers and wine is not welcome when your wife is busy having sex with your brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (97023) - you deserved it (3059)
On 08/05/2009 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I was getting mugged. In shock, I said, "Are you mugging me?!" To which the mugger responded, "Duh, do you think I grabbed you for your looks?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (42443) - you deserved it (6316)
On 08/04/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was at home, my mom came and saw me holding what she thought was a glass of beer. She took the glass, threw it and slapped me for drinking it. I was drinking Apple Juice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47457) - you deserved it (2399)
On 08/02/2009 at 12:14pm - misc - by kashish0711 (man) - India (Chandigarh)
Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49732) - you deserved it (13476)
On 07/30/2009 at 10:43am - animals - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew
Today, my boyfriend said he couldn't come to my grandfathers funeral because he was at his cottage and couldn't make it. Later that day, when driving home from the graveyard I saw him walking down the street, with another girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43898) - you deserved it (2075)
On 07/24/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by Lyingboyfriend (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I said to our pool-boy, "I know what you're doing, and you have to stop it." He started shouting that I had no right to tell them what to do and that they were in love. He was referring to his relationship with my eldest son. I wanted to tell him to stop drinking my beers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47803) - you deserved it (6276)
On 07/23/2009 at 7:13am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Greece (Attiki)
Today, I was fired from the babysitting job I have had for 2 years. I thought maybe the mother had found out that I sometimes let her kids stay up late and have extra sweets. The real reason, as she told me, was that she didn't want her kids loving anyone more than they love her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45296) - you deserved it (2245)
On 07/22/2009 at 8:17am - work - by babysitter93 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Monday 17 June 2013
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