gofriars

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gofriars

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 January 1987 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 25745
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About gofriars : I'll almost always find a way you deserved it.

gofriars's page activity

Visits<b>threer</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 2:12pm<b>The_Illegal_Juan</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 12:17pm<b>missmorggan</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 7:47am<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 12:18am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 8:03am<b>kukumber</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 5:16pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 1:27pm<b>XmasaX</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 9:19am<b>Akazuki</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 1:11am<b>bkirky</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 1:11am<b>Kyle_Thompson17</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:55pm<b>CAC_Boomerang</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 8:58pm<b>ontheburge</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 8:31pm<b>vb68</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 11:44pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 2:40am<b>yeahbuddy2575</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 8:09pm<b>Flendre_scarlet</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 1:38am<b>justinccp</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 12:35pm

gofriars's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

gofriars's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to go to my 10 year old son's school to talk about my job being a chef. As I was almost finished, I asked the kids "What would you like to do when you grow up?" Without hesitation one kid replied with a straight face , "Anything but being a douchebag like you." FML

by helen_ / 04/23/2009 at 11:51am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I ran to a public bathroom because of explosive diarrhea. In the middle of it, I noticed there was no more toilet paper nor paper towels remaining. The smallest bill in my wallet was a 5. I had to pay 10 dollars to wipe my own butt. FML

by highleyj / 04/01/2009 at 4:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was with my grandma waiting in a line. She only speaks Chinese and there was a black man in front of us talking his phone. My grandma tells me that the black man's really loud and annoying. The man finishes and turns and said fluently in Chinese, "What's wrong with loud black men?" FML

by kaichennnxx / 03/16/2009 at 10:09pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my birthday. My girlfriend bought me a Nickelback CD. FML

by deez_nutz / 03/10/2009 at 8:46am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was having birthday dinner with my girlfriend and her parents, when her Dad asked what I got her she replied "He said he was going to give me a Pearl Necklace when we get home." I realized then that my girlfriend did not know what I meant by 'Pearl Necklace.' FML

by Ethan / 03/09/2009 at 9:35am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, I was driving down the road when I got to a red light. I looked over and saw a hot chick in a convertible so I spoke to my window thinking she couldn't hear me "Hey girl, I may have a tiny dick but I make up for it in speed and stamina." She looked over. I forgot about the sunroof. FML

by Smash_Mouth / 03/08/2009 at 12:36am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my wife and I were driving to the gas station, she let me out before she pulled up to the pumps because I had to buy some things from the store. I returned to see my wife proudly filling the tank. Smiling, she told me that diesel was cheaper than regular gas. We don't own a diesel car. FML

by Damn_her / 03/04/2009 at 7:04pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Love

Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML

by Girl123999 / 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML

by ohmygoodness / 03/02/2009 at 4:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML

by Noname / 02/26/2009 at 10:30am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML

by AppoKing / 02/19/2009 at 4:14pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the creepy skin care guy at the mall with the heavy accent asked me if I was pregnant. When I said no he replied "Oh, too many donuts then?" FML

by notpreggers / 02/07/2009 at 7:54pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous