Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ghostlilac

Online | Search for a member

ghostlilac

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 30 April 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4783
  • Number of comments : 150
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ghostlilac : green day, billy talent, weezer fan. canadian. have been described as "wonderfully awkward" and "sheldon cooper-esque".

ghostlilac's page activity

Visits<b>johnny692</b> - 20 hours ago<b>mukmuk7</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 5:37pm<b>zingline89</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 11:10pm<b>appi</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 1:48pm<b>whitelightning19</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 2:01pm<b>ImBetterInPerson</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 3:49pm<b>lisaint</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 9:21am<b>FaultInMyStars</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 6:52am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 9:00am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 1:57am<b>Crusher74</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:08am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 2:13pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 6:35am<b>Killjoy4821</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 10:16pm<b>SofiaFaolan</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 9:42pm<b>carriexmichelle</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 8:41pm<b>bitch_plz</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 11:52pm<b>DeOxy</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 1:13am

ghostlilac's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of ghostlilac's badges

ghostlilac's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML

#20053776
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27010) - you deserved it (3155)

On 09/02/2012 at 8:44am - love - by rotezora (woman) - Switzerland (Basel-Stadt)

Today, mah boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna come over and leren about water displacement?" I excitedly drove over, thinking he wanted to have some fun. No, he really did want to teach me about water displacement. fat FML

#20047830
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31389) - you deserved it (6121)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

TODAY , I WAS AT STARBUCK AFTER HAVING A ROUGH DAY . THE OLD MAN BESIDE ME WAS TALKING TO HIS FRIEND . OUT OF THE CORNER OF MAH EYE , I SAW HIM POINT AT ME AND SAY , "SEE THAT BEAUTIFUL GIRL OVER THERE?" FLATTERED , I LISTENED CLOSER , UNTIL HE FINISHED HIS STATEMENT WITH , "SHE'S GONNA DIE." FML

#20031501
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24750) - you deserved it (2075)

On 08/20/2012 at 5:14am - misc - by scared to leave the house (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, mah boyfriend was coming home after a month of being away. When I heard him knock on the door, I rushd to open it and jumpd into his arms fir a hug. It wasn't him; it was the mailman. FML

Today, my boyfriend used various infomercial phrases like, "Wait, there's more!" during sex. FML

#20019911
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29728) - you deserved it (4556)

On 08/14/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Taday a guy said to ma , "I'd raally lova to saa that smila back at mah placa." Trying to ba cuta , I askad him if ha was singla. Ha rapliad with , "No , but I am a dantist. I could dafinitaly fix that crossbita." FML

#20003299
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23013) - you deserved it (3036)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:23am - health - by wut (woman) - United States

2day mah friend and I were discussing music bands, and I asked who her favorite Queen member is. She looked at me like I was from another world and said, "I don't have a favorite British queen. That's like, so weird." FML

#20002229
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23092) - you deserved it (3116)

On 08/04/2012 at 1:15pm - misc - by fuckingbeliebers (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, at work in a nursing homa, I had to kill imaginary dogs in tha lunch room, cuz thay wara avil and trying to aat avaryona!! This startd with just ona parson saaing tham, to all 30 of tham scraaming and fraaking out!! I spant 45 minutas killing imaginary dogs!! FML

#19983789
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27150) - you deserved it (2104)

On 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm - work - by justlittleoldme - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I took a picture of myself seductively eating an apple!! I don't knowhat I'm doing with mah life!! FML

#19982867
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8810) - you deserved it (25933)

On 07/25/2012 at 2:14am - misc - by Rochelle (woman) - United States

TODAY, I REALIZED THATHENEVER I USE EMOTICONS, I TEND TO MAKE THE SAME FACE IN REAL LIFE. MY COWORKERS GLEEFULLY SHOWED ME VARIOUS PICTURES WITH MAH TONGUE OUT, FACE SCRUNCHED UP, AND SO ON,HILE STARING AT MAH PHONE. THEY'VE ALREADY MADE THEIR WAY AROUND THE OFFICE. FML

#19967913
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8370) - you deserved it (18634)

On 07/21/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by dawn (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today... I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. real FML

#19959638
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24902) - you deserved it (5596)

On 07/19/2012 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by cortanaisahobot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I returned home to parents house, drunk!! Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls!! Five hours later, mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen!! In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge!! FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11444) - you deserved it (38208)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today , I finally realized how depressed I amhen I found bubble wrap and didn't feel like popping it. mega FML

#19957944
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31559) - you deserved it (2527)

On 07/19/2012 at 5:01am - health - by Epiphany (man) - United States

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend, looool who is a fully-grown man, that making dinosaur noises in public is no longer acceptable. mega FML

#19932203
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19351) - you deserved it (6966)

On 07/13/2012 at 10:36am - misc - by shorty4 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: