Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ghostlilac

Search for a member

ghostlilac

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 30 April 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3214
  • Number of comments : 149
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ghostlilac : weezer fan. almost albino. have been described as "wonderfully awkward" and "sheldon cooper-esque".

ghostlilac's page activity

Visits<b>redstone7693</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 2:13pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 6:35am<b>Killjoy4821</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 10:16pm<b>SofiaFaolan</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 9:42pm<b>carriexmichelle</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 8:41pm<b>bitch_plz</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 11:52pm<b>DeOxy</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 1:13am<b>SJParker</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 10:32am<b>XxOrangexX</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 9:41am<b>TheDinhDonger</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 9:27am<b>WeezingTheJuice</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 12:03am<b>BigSeedDeed99</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 9:58am<b>Npinzon1994</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 8:36pm<b>dalenick</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 11:19am<b>erinrichyrich</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 10:22pm<b>thesnypist8</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 4:15pm<b>WhoaIsMe93</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 4:04pm<b>itsjustcynn</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 2:49pm

ghostlilac's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of ghostlilac's badges

ghostlilac's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna come over and learn about water displacement?" I excitedly drove over, thinking he wanted to have some fun. No, he really did want to teach me about water displacement. FML

#20047830
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30743) - you deserved it (6047)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at Starbucks after having a rough day. The old man beside me was talking to his friend. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him point at me and say, "See that beautiful girl over there?" Flattered, I listened closer, until he finished his statement with, "She's gonna die." FML

#20031501
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23790) - you deserved it (1942)

On 08/20/2012 at 5:14am - misc - by scared to leave the house (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend was coming home after a month of being away. When I heard him knock on the door, I rushed to open it and jumped into his arms for a hug. It wasn't him; it was the mailman. FML

Today, my boyfriend used various infomercial phrases like, "Wait, there's more!" during sex. FML

#20019911
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27584) - you deserved it (4293)

On 08/14/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, a guy said to me, "I'd really love to see that smile back at my place." Trying to be cute, I asked him if he was single. He replied with, "No, but I am a dentist. I could definitely fix that crossbite." FML

#20003299
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21883) - you deserved it (2917)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:23am - health - by wut (woman) - United States

Today, my friend and I were discussing music bands, and I asked who her favorite Queen member is. She looked at me like I was from another world and said, "I don't have a favorite British queen. That's like, so weird." FML

#20002229
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21616) - you deserved it (2952)

On 08/04/2012 at 1:15pm - misc - by fuckingbeliebers (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML

#19983789
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26853) - you deserved it (2077)

On 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm - work - by justlittleoldme - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I took a picture of myself seductively eating an apple. I don't know what I'm doing with my life. FML

#19982867
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8173) - you deserved it (24430)

On 07/25/2012 at 2:14am - misc - by Rochelle (woman) - United States

Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML

#19967913
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7682) - you deserved it (17334)

On 07/21/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by dawn (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML

#19959638
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23866) - you deserved it (5451)

On 07/19/2012 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by cortanaisahobot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10668) - you deserved it (36737)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I finally realized how depressed I am when I found bubble wrap and didn't feel like popping it. FML

#19957944
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31189) - you deserved it (2495)

On 07/19/2012 at 5:01am - health - by Epiphany (man) - United States

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend, who is a fully-grown man, that making dinosaur noises in public is no longer acceptable. FML

#19932203
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18230) - you deserved it (6786)

On 07/13/2012 at 10:36am - misc - by shorty4 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

#19926709
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32349) - you deserved it (4084)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: