Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

gharra5

Search for a member

gharra5
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 824
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

gharra5's last visitors

seth7_

gharra5's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

gharra5's favorite FMLs

Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML

#17080358
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36869) - you deserved it (21187)

On 07/12/2011 at 1:09pm - misc - by couldntholdit (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had diarrhea at work. While trying to be subtle about the noises, the woman in the stall next to me called me by name and asked if I was having trouble. FML

#17066574
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29642) - you deserved it (2563)

On 07/11/2011 at 1:42pm - work - by Username - United States

Today, I went to the park with a girl I like. She got playful and climbed a tree, insisting I come up, too. While we were sitting and enjoying the view, she suddenly knocked me off the branch, sending me crashing to the ground. FML

#17044737
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32312) - you deserved it (5490)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:13pm - love - by wolf boy - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

#17032745
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8562) - you deserved it (58545) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to videotape his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML

#16966057
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33849) - you deserved it (5011)

On 07/03/2011 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by WasteOMoney - United States (Texas)

Today, while riding a roller coaster I got hit in the chest by a wasp going 80 miles per hour. As if that didn't hurt enough it somehow managed to survive and fell down my shirt. It crawled around and bit me a few times before the ride ended. FML

#16956758
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33039) - you deserved it (3442)

On 07/03/2011 at 1:25am - animals - by jreed509 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after a long night of drinking and partying, I woke up in my bed next to a beast of a woman. At least I know I made it home safely. FML

#16696125
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10038) - you deserved it (40905)

On 06/16/2011 at 2:34pm - intimacy - by Madmanmorton (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was in my family's hotel room taking a dump. The lock to the bathroom was broken so we had made a deal: when the door is closed, someone is using the toilet. The maid didn't know that. She punched me in the face because she claimed I scared her. FML

#16675127
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30053) - you deserved it (2706)

On 06/15/2011 at 9:37am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, my parents grounded me and took away my phone, iPod and door. That's right, my door. They think that because I was stumbling and couldn't walk straight last night, I must have been out drinking. They know I suffer from chronic vertigo, but don't believe I was having an attack. FML

#16608434
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38014) - you deserved it (2751)

On 06/11/2011 at 9:06am - health - by sickbaby (woman) - Singapore

Today, I used the staff toilets at school. As I sat down, I heard a sudden plop, followed by the stench of diarrhoea from the next cubicle. It was followed by a "I do apologise!" It was my English teacher. And we continued to chat. FML

#16575897
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31130) - you deserved it (6645)

On 06/09/2011 at 9:22am - health - by IPityTheStool (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while in class, I desperately had to fart. Someone in the room had a coughing fit, so I took that as the chance to let it out. When I was about to release, the coughing stopped. I couldn't stop in time. FML

#16561931
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15706) - you deserved it (35704)

On 06/08/2011 at 12:47pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, while in class, I desperately had to fart. Someone in the room had a coughing fit, so I took that as the chance to let it out. When I was about to release, the coughing stopped. I couldn't stop in time. FML

#16561931
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15706) - you deserved it (35704)

On 06/08/2011 at 12:47pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML

#16516164
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15941) - you deserved it (40249)

On 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm - misc - by - United States

Today, whilst at my job as a lifeguard, a small child decided he couldn't hold it any longer and released his bowels in the pool. It was my job to clean up his dump, including the floating pieces of sweetcorn. FML

#16474774
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30778) - you deserved it (2132)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:44pm - work - by corn - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

#16449288
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61478) - you deserved it (3348)

On 06/01/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by aarone23 - United States (Oklahoma)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: