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gharra5

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gharra5

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1937
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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gharra5's page activity

Visits<b>Higamalia</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 8:30pm<b>melinal</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 7:43pm<b>seth7_</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 1:24pm

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gharra5's favorite FMLs

Today, while attempting the Italian Chandelier with my girlfriend, I heard a popping noise, and then had a sharp pain in my dick. Turns out I "broke" it. Instead of calling 911 immediately, my girlfriend remarked how my now black and blue penis looked like a Smurf. FML

#20003323
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27451) - you deserved it (5842)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my friend and I were discussing music bands, and I asked who her favorite Queen member is. She looked at me like I was from another world and said, "I don't have a favorite British queen. That's like, so weird." FML

#20002229
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21676) - you deserved it (2954)

On 08/04/2012 at 1:15pm - misc - by fuckingbeliebers (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, after waking up, I went into the kitchen and took a swig of milk from the carton. I overestimated my strength, and the whole thing splashed all over my face. A few moments later, my dad staggered in, looked at me in disgust, and said, "You know what? I don't even wanna know." FML

#20000538
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17047) - you deserved it (9598)

On 08/03/2012 at 3:28pm - misc - by squeltorey (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was babysitting three kids, one of whom was particularly difficult to control. While trying to get him to behave, the two girls came up behind me and pulled my pants down. In front of a huge window open to the street below. FML

#19994550
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18491) - you deserved it (2025)

On 07/31/2012 at 1:43pm - kids - by 1D-107 - United States (Utah)

Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML

#19994389
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7966) - you deserved it (46365)

On 07/31/2012 at 11:53am - love - by TheMissMuffly (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to my favorite burger joint. Upon taking the first bite of my burger, I dislocated my jaw, and the waiters had to call 911. FML

#19990108
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21094) - you deserved it (2287)

On 07/29/2012 at 1:15am - health - by cherknobil (man) - United States (California)

Today, while getting ready to go to bed, I told my boyfriend that I feel depressed due to the lack of intimacy in our relationship. His response was to roll over, fall asleep, and send a deadly fart my way. FML

#19990004
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21680) - you deserved it (3262)

On 07/29/2012 at 12:25am - love - by Anonymous - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, my grandpa told my mom that he needs to rewrite his will soon. I jokingly said that I was going to be stinking rich when he passes away. He retorted that he's never forgiven me for rear-ending his car six years ago, and because of this, I'll never see a penny of his money. FML

#19989463
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7919) - you deserved it (28552)

On 07/28/2012 at 6:15pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, I went on an overnight airplane flight. I wanted to be comfy so I took off my shorts, threw a blanket over myself, and slept. When the lights came back on, I ran to the bathroom before they served food. After using the bathroom, I noticed I hadn't put my shorts back on. FML

#19988832
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6020) - you deserved it (36150)

On 07/28/2012 at 9:26am - misc - by anonymous - Lebanon

Today, a homeless lady decided she needed to change underwear in the middle of the sidewalk. I turned around just in time to see her legs in the air with no undies on. I can never eat salami again. FML

#19988661
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20313) - you deserved it (2051)

On 07/28/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by em from Cali - United States (California)

Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML

#19986553
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5855) - you deserved it (37116)

On 07/27/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by ryanharp2 - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I learned why one should never insert a tampon after squeezing lemons. FML

Today, I had to turn down an offer of what seemed like some sexy time with a cute girl because my intestines were bursting with an intense desire to unleash molten lava. I rushed home to squat down, only to let out a disappointingly small piece of crud and a tiny fart. FML

#19984638
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27935) - you deserved it (5152)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Jarman (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, out of curiosity, I measured the length of my penis whilst in the shower. A couple of hours later, my father called me downstairs to show me something. Turns out I left the ruler on top of the shower tree. He won't stop laughing. FML

#19984171
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9377) - you deserved it (33339)

On 07/25/2012 at 9:11pm - intimacy - by Infiltrator4444 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, a customer punched me in the face for repeating their order back to them because they thought I was making fun of their speech impediment. I have the same speech impediment. FML

#19982373
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34307) - you deserved it (1863)

On 07/24/2012 at 9:37pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)



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