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Mobility
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I finally worked up the courage to talk to this hot guy in my law school contracts class. His response? "I'm no fashion expert, but I don't think you're supposed to wear purple underwear with white pants. Not that it matters, though, because your zipper is wide open." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13510) - you deserved it (29754)
On 05/18/2010 at 1:22am - love - by Dana422 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I learned that, since getting my tongue ring, it has become imprudent to test 9-volt batteries with my tongue. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3818) - you deserved it (30298)
On 05/17/2010 at 7:09am - misc - by Zapped - United States (New York)
Today, I wrapped a towel around my waist so I could take a dump while using my laptop. I sat on the toilet seat and let a big load go. Turns out I forgot to unwrap the towel. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6100) - you deserved it (48241)
On 04/16/2010 at 8:34am - health - by TowelSmellsNice (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)
Today, I found out that my mom is not only reading my mail, but she is also withholding letters from my bank, college, and insurance company. Why? Because "they could be inappropriate" for me to read. I'm 25. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22013) - you deserved it (2437)
On 03/09/2010 at 9:09am - misc - by xele (man) - Poland (Katowice)
Today, I realized I'd rather be constipated, sick, sit in long traffic lines and inadvertantly eat spoiled meat than spend another day at my shitty job. All things that happened to me today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14531) - you deserved it (1687)
On 03/05/2010 at 3:01am - work - by Petergibbons - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be amusing to sneak into my room and jump me in my bed. Too bad that when she jumped, one of her knees landed on my crotch. I haven't been able to walk properly since this morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17314) - you deserved it (2262)
On 03/03/2010 at 7:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, trying to take initiative, I wore nothing but an apron and led my husband to the kitchen by his knob to have some fun. I tripped on the floor and used his knob to keep balance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14082) - you deserved it (4910)
On 03/03/2010 at 11:22am - intimacy - by Sorry (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I fell asleep in a taxi. So did the taxi driver. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23678) - you deserved it (2083)
Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29068) - you deserved it (1696)
On 03/01/2010 at 8:17am - misc - by GuiltByTenuousAssociation (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my fiancée and I were selecting our wedding cake. The wedding is now off since I refused to buy her the "dream" wedding cake she wanted because it was chocolate. She called me childish and cheap. I'm highly allergic to chocolate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30110) - you deserved it (2370)
On 02/25/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by Ringless - United States (Virginia)
Today, I drunkenly hooked up with my friend's cousin. After trying to stick his finger up my butt, he blacked out on top of me with his penis still hard inside me. I tried yelling his name and pushing him off, with no success. I ended up having to call my friend to help me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6339) - you deserved it (14626)
On 02/23/2010 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by lendahandmanda (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got off from work and noticed that the weather finally warmed up after the recent snowstorm. I hopped into my car and rolled down the windows. When I opened the sun roof, a foot of snow came falling into my car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4019) - you deserved it (29508)
On 02/23/2010 at 3:55pm - misc - by Chris Altenbach - United States (Colorado)
Today, I tried to see if you can kick yourself in the nuts. You can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3728) - you deserved it (47753)
On 02/23/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by nutcracker (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)
Today, I got stuck in my apartment's garbage chute. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7527) - you deserved it (19311)
On 02/20/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by AwwChute (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was in my drama class and I was standing behind the curtains. My friend accidentally bumped me into the bin that was hidden behind the curtain. Everyone heard me fall and they opened the curtains. My butt was stuck in it and my knees were in front of my face. No one helped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14672) - you deserved it (2004)
On 02/05/2010 at 8:20pm - misc - by JD (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 20 May 2013
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