This member hasn't filled in the description.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13324) - you deserved it (32028) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins
Today, my parrot won't stop repeating my boyfriend's name. The problem is we broke up days ago and my parrot won't shut up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20176) - you deserved it (3462)
On 01/12/2011 at 11:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I had to explain to my friend why it's inappropriate to conduct a phone conversation while simultaneously eating a bagel, listening to music, and taking a shit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16681) - you deserved it (2683)
On 01/09/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, feeling melancholy, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23207) - you deserved it (4417)
On 01/06/2011 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was at my friend's house. We were looking at her dad's guns, and I was explaining gun safety and how you should never put your finger on the trigger. I then shot a hole in the floor of her house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4390) - you deserved it (28262)
On 01/03/2011 at 6:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, my father had a dream that he'd lost me forever, and the pain was so unbearable, it woke him up. Turns out, the pain he was experiencing was just his bowels and he really needed to take a shit. This is the most affection I've ever received from my father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19148) - you deserved it (2298)
On 12/30/2010 at 5:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, I tried to contact my birth mother, who abandoned me when I was three weeks old. After months of tracing, I finally plucked up the courage to call her. She told me to "f*ck off and die". FML
I agree, your life sucks (42213) - you deserved it (5135)
On 12/23/2010 at 11:13am - misc - by unfortunategeek - United Kingdom
Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML
I agree, your life sucks (33421) - you deserved it (6870)
On 12/23/2010 at 1:36am - intimacy - by nemo518 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out that if I try to resist a 70 pound bulldog that's humping my leg, I will end up with stitches. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21712) - you deserved it (2115)
On 12/22/2010 at 2:54am - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27480) - you deserved it (3058)
On 12/18/2010 at 4:11am - love - by anonymous - United States (South Carolina)
Today, while playing soccer, I was kicked so hard in the shin that my tibia snapped. The snap was so loud that even the audience heard. As we waited for an ambulance, my mom started yelling for me to get off the field so the game could continue. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34699) - you deserved it (2445)
On 12/10/2010 at 12:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I decided to take a nap in the university library. I felt like I'd only closed my eyes for a minute, when a guy woke me up to tell me that I'd been farting in my sleep for the last half hour, and that the librarian was becoming concerned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21460) - you deserved it (6475)
On 12/06/2010 at 5:53pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I decided to take a nap in the university library. I felt like I'd only closed my eyes for a minute, when a guy woke me up to tell me that I'd been farting in my sleep for the last half hour, and that the librarian was becoming concerned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21460) - you deserved it (6475)
On 12/06/2010 at 5:53pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend was making salsa and got jalepeno juice all over his mouth. A little bit later, he started going down me. He hadn't washed his mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30537) - you deserved it (3959)
On 12/03/2010 at 7:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I went to a very crowded restaurant. Being really shy, I requested to sit in the corner, but instead they placed me in the center of the dinning area. I started to eat my food and got really spaced out. Suddenly I sneeze-farted and everyone turned to look at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20077) - you deserved it (5221)
On 11/28/2010 at 3:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
