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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I caught the train into the city. Halfway there some kids hopped on smelling of marijuana and alcohol. Their topic of discussion? How much pubic hair they had. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14917) - you deserved it (2053)
On 11/29/2012 at 12:40am - kids - by fabs1171 - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, this really big woman asked me for some cigarettes. I didn't have any, which made her angry. Angry enough to pick me up, stuff me in a dumpster, and sit on the lid. I still smell like garbage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19418) - you deserved it (1313)
On 11/28/2012 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I'm recovering in the emergency room. How did I get here? Intoxicated at a coed party, I saw a hole in the host's shed and thought it funny to christen it a "glory-hole", only to be bitten by what may well have been a black widow spider. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4327) - you deserved it (29213)
On 11/28/2012 at 1:09pm - health - by Widowmaker - United States (Nevada)
Today, I was working the dart game at my local amusement park when a couple paid to play. They were highly intoxicated, and they thought the object of the game was to hit me with the darts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16901) - you deserved it (1297)
On 11/28/2012 at 10:14am - work - by hawksbc (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, drunk at a party, I leaned through a window to throw up. I was outside. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5619) - you deserved it (17536) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 11/28/2012 at 1:20am - health - by kise - Sent from mobile version
Today, my wife wants to name our first child Siri, after the iPhone function. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19690) - you deserved it (1687)
On 11/28/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by boo8713 (man) - United States (California)
Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20375) - you deserved it (1952)
On 11/26/2012 at 6:11pm - misc - by ronboy - United States (Ohio)
Today, I ran into my sister, who nobody in the family has seen in six years. She looked very happy working the pole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23671) - you deserved it (2911)
On 11/26/2012 at 3:54pm - misc - by Teddy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I woke up to my balls covered in Icy Hot, a big old "fuck you" note from my girlfriend, and my door slamming shut. I'm starting to get the distinct impression I shouldn't have made that off-hand remark last night about her PMSing, after she rage-quit a game of Mario Kart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10358) - you deserved it (20784)
On 11/25/2012 at 5:38pm - love - by dumping time (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)
Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13132) - you deserved it (5272)
On 11/25/2012 at 1:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19918) - you deserved it (1213)
On 11/24/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Read The Fine Print - United States (California)
Today, I had a sex dream, which I interrupted by having an OCD-induced panic attack because apparently we weren't using protection. My brain won't even let me enjoy the fantasy action I get in my sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19655) - you deserved it (1885)
On 11/21/2012 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Dead_Fox (man) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9105) - you deserved it (25377)
On 11/20/2012 at 3:43am - intimacy - by kinkicali (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my parents kindly told me what they are getting me for my 18th birthday. An eviction notice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15139) - you deserved it (2453)
On 11/20/2012 at 1:47am - kids - by lea5459 - United States (Oregon)
Today, I realized I'd put on my shirt on inside out, so I went to the bathroom stalls to fix it. As I was taking it off, I accidentally dropped it in the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21470) - you deserved it (3613)
On 11/19/2012 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Monday 17 June 2013
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