Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

gharra5

Offline (yesterday at 6:34am) | Search for a member

gharra5

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9221
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

gharra5's page activity

Visits<b>ErinRosado</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 4:07am<b>hammonds92</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 12:13pm<b>Higamalia</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 1:38pm<b>windell</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 1:32pm<b>melinal</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 7:43pm<b>seth7_</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 1:24pm

gharra5's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of gharra5's badges

gharra5's favorite FMLs

Today, in the middle of my haircut, the hairdresser went into labor. They never finished cutting it. FML

#21347835
76 comments

Today, after getting home from being in the field for a week, my wife who's a nurse, convinced me I had a spider bite on my penis. After rushing to the ER and standing nude in a cold exam room while the ER staff checked me out, I learned it's just an ingrown hair. FML

#21347765
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27281) - you deserved it (2724)

On 02/01/2015 at 1:13pm - health - by Why's it so cold in here? - United States

Today, I had food poisoning and woke up early in the morning to vomit. My mom emailed all of my teachers saying that I would be late to school because of "morning sickness". Thanks mom. FML

#21347496
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30105) - you deserved it (2149)

On 01/31/2015 at 9:43pm - health - by Lunab123 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I got married. My grandpa took me aside afterwards and said that the moment the ceremony was over, he heard my wife's vagina slam shut. "Welcome to marriage, sucker," he chuckled, "It's just you and Rosy Palm now!" FML

#21347104
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28596) - you deserved it (2998)

On 01/31/2015 at 12:38am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, when making a delivery for the restaurant I work for, a customer shoved and yelled at me because she didn't get any fries with her order. She didn't order any, which isn't unusual, considering we're a Chinese takeaway and don't even sell them. FML

#21347009
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27971) - you deserved it (1759)

On 01/30/2015 at 8:25pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I asked my friend to download Frozen for me, because my mom wanted to play it for family movie night. The movie was shit, but it got even worse halfway through, when it cut to hardcore porn and a text bar saying "umad?" Now I'm grounded, and my "friend" is a legend for his prank. FML

#21346882
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30063) - you deserved it (5215)

On 01/30/2015 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, for the nth time, my father reminded me that I should study things related to the "real" world, as if I was studying theology, astrology or something. I'm studying for a master's degree in physics. FML

#21346352
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26844) - you deserved it (2374)

On 01/29/2015 at 6:32pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I had a one night stand. After holding in my farts all night as is done, I decided enough was enough and to calmly let one slip out. One did not calmly slip out instead I shit myself in her bed. I was naked at the time so was unable to hide it. FML

#21346279
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29977) - you deserved it (13192)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I went to have a pre-cancerous mole removed off of my nose. When the doctor numbed my nose, she didn't check to see if the anesthetic actually worked, and began hacking away at my nose, leaving me to feel every last flick of the razor. Turns out I have an immunity to that anesthetic. FML

#21346273
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28465) - you deserved it (2215)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:00pm - health - by ThatWasntFun - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to run for the train, but because of my bad foot and limping they held the train, much to people's displeasure. No one let me sit down, so for the 20 minute journey, I stood. With a bad foot. FML

#21346090
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27413) - you deserved it (3737)

On 01/29/2015 at 7:56am - work - by vampyrate3562 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the local park for some romantic time together. By the time we left, I'd been called a pedo and a cradle robber, and been given several dirty looks. I'm 31. My boyfriend is 30 and just very baby-faced. FML

#21345623
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29519) - you deserved it (2370)

On 01/28/2015 at 2:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was ringing up a woman at work. I saw she'd bought a birthday cake, so I smiled and said I hope whoever it was for has a happy birthday. She looked at me in disgust, told me to mind my own business, then called me a "chucklefuck bitch". Okay then. FML

#21345551
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28575) - you deserved it (2238)

On 01/28/2015 at 10:01am - work - by retailshell (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, is the blizzard. I have to go into work, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't show up. I sent him a picture of the snow completely covering my car. He said I moved the snow there and could move it back. FML

#21345232
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26663) - you deserved it (1748)

On 01/27/2015 at 6:50pm - work - by bitchypast - United States (Maine)

Today, after I got home from a long day at work. I go inside my room and find a life-size cut out of Miley Cyrus. I don't know how it got here. I'm the only person with a key to my apartment. FML

#21345231
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28905) - you deserved it (1992)

On 01/27/2015 at 6:46pm - misc - by I'm screwed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boss expected me to corroborate her lie to a customer. She changed her story suddenly and I got caught up in the crosshairs. Then she got mad at me for not understanding what just happened. FML

#21345151
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22769) - you deserved it (1969)

On 01/27/2015 at 4:17pm - work - by morning_glory - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: