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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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genius_man16

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genius_man16
  • Town/Country : Lincoln, NE
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 September 1989 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 375204
  • Number of comments : 657
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About genius_man16 : I'm fucking awesome, more awesome than you.
I think moderated comments are the single most retarded thing on this site.
I'm in love with my best friend Samantha.
I love video games.
I love Sports.
I want to be an animator when I graduate from college.
I'm terribly shy.
I suck at starting and keeping a conversation.
I also like to swear. A lot.
Everything is a sexual innuendo, including this sentence. If ya know what I mean.

genius_man16's last visitors

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genius_man16's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

genius_man16's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a club with my girlfriend of a year. A guy starts hitting on her while I'm sitting right next to her. He then asks her to go back to his place for some fun, I start laughing thinking that there is no chance she would even consider this. I walked home alone. FML

#4844745 (246)

I agree, your life sucks (45715) - you deserved it (5647)

On 08/26/2009 at 8:37pm - love - by lonelyboy101 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I punched the air enthusiastically after getting an impossible question right. Unfortunately, above me was an old fashioned mole trap, with 6 small spikes and 2 large ones. I now have 6 puncture wounds in my hand, and two in my shoulder, as it fell off the hook it was hanging on. FML

#4746647 (133)

I agree, your life sucks (16455) - you deserved it (4868)

On 08/22/2009 at 10:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride:1 - Getting Laid:0. FML

#4673205 (319)

I agree, your life sucks (6284) - you deserved it (66751)

On 08/20/2009 at 1:45am - love - by razgriz1 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, a girl was tailgating me, even though I was going at speed limit. Annoyed, I drove 10 mph under the speed limit, and every time she honked, I went 5mph slower. Too bad she got the last laugh... I was pulled over for "reckless driving." FML

#4589153 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (13742) - you deserved it (30024)

On 08/17/2009 at 12:44am - misc - by tailgaterhater - United States (Washington)

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

#3950301 (181)

I agree, your life sucks (63759) - you deserved it (4387)

On 07/22/2009 at 10:12am - intimacy - by Gordon (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML

#3894865 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (41993) - you deserved it (1935)

On 07/20/2009 at 12:04am - love - by thicklysettled (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at martial arts practice, a guest sensei wanted to teach me some "manners". He pinned me down and proceded to choke me while crushing my nuts with his hands and yelling at me in front of the whole class, "DOES THAT HURT?!!?" FML

#3769867 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (35666) - you deserved it (6003)

On 07/15/2009 at 9:21am - misc - by GrippedMyBalls - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I was at Target with my mom and we finished purchasing our items. We had gotten a fan so I said,"This thing is too big to fit in." First thing my mom yells? "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" and starts laughing hysterically in front of the entire store. FML

#3692539 (294)

I agree, your life sucks (38598) - you deserved it (8716)

On 07/12/2009 at 2:25pm - misc - by embarrassed (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend was on the roof of his house. I climbed the ladder but I am kind of scared of heights so when I got up there I just sat on the edge. The gutter broke and fell down and I fell along with it. My boyfriend said, "I've been trying to tell you to go on a diet". FML

#3413301 (84)

I agree, your life sucks (31737) - you deserved it (5778)

On 07/01/2009 at 11:36pm - misc - by sydsophnova (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at walmart when my stomach began to hurt. I quickly waddled to the restroom in pain. As soon as I got in the stall, a huge crap exploded out of me. The child in the stall next to me started crying. When her mom asked what was wrong she said that I'd "killed her nose". FML

#3361418 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (46078) - you deserved it (6572)

On 06/30/2009 at 7:53am - health - by poopshooter101 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went on my honeymoon to Hawaii. My family decided to surprise my new husband and I by joining us on our vacation. FML

#3345356 (195)

I agree, your life sucks (64759) - you deserved it (1769)

On 06/29/2009 at 8:57pm - misc - by marriedwithfamily (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was visiting my friends new house and he was showing me around. I saw a small door in the wall and decided to open it. When I opened it, his daughter was hiding in there and screamed to scare me. Now I know my scream is more high pitched than his daughters. I'm a 37 year old male. FML

#3188725 (52)

I agree, your life sucks (23567) - you deserved it (4717)

On 06/24/2009 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went out to dinner with my brother. There was a very attractive man sitting a few tables away who kept glancing at me. When my brother excused himself to the bathroom, the man worked up the courage to come over and introduce himself to me. He asked me if my brother was single. FML

#3104897 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (51364) - you deserved it (3241)

On 06/21/2009 at 10:45pm - intimacy - by Kat (woman) - United States

Today, I was asking my one year old nephew what noises certain animals make. I decided to trick him and ask him what sound I make. He immediately says, "MOOOO". FML

#3088891 (150)

I agree, your life sucks (27915) - you deserved it (10905)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:03pm - kids - by vballqt201 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod and leaves. FML

#2932416 (203)

I agree, your life sucks (61410) - you deserved it (3890)

On 06/16/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Tim (man) - United States (Massachusetts)