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garikay

Offline (the 12/30/2015 at 4:25am) | Search for a member

garikay

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1536
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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garikay's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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garikay's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home to find my dad drinking. Trying to be cheerful, I greeted him with a "Hi, dad!" He sighed, shook his head, and said "It hurts me when you call me that." FML

#21410667
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32094) - you deserved it (2259)

On 05/15/2015 at 7:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend why he was dating me. He replied, "Well, there's not a lot of options at this college." FML

#21410138
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32101) - you deserved it (4650)

On 05/14/2015 at 6:17pm - love - by what even - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to work at my job as a CNA at a long-term care facility. I'm also on a medication that has a side effect of confusion. I had 3 residents with Alzheimer's tell me to 'get my shit together.' FML

Today, I found my 15-year-old son sleeping on the couch. I asked why, and he said he'd rented his room out to someone on Craigslist to make extra money, so he was getting used to sleeping in the living room instead. FML

#21406874
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31274) - you deserved it (2725)

On 05/08/2015 at 5:19pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML

#21406764
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21791) - you deserved it (39692)

On 05/08/2015 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, my main source of income is finding money on the ground. FML

#21406019
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29124) - you deserved it (5368)

On 05/07/2015 at 1:12am - work - by CASH_NoMOMEY - United States (California)

Today, marks the fourth day in a row that I've worn the same outfit to prove to my parents that they pay me no attention. They still haven't noticed. FML

#21405167
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31228) - you deserved it (3435)

On 05/05/2015 at 3:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out why my husband has been coming home from work so late. Turns out he loves to help people. Specifically female people. And by help, I mean sleep with. FML

#21403935
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36610) - you deserved it (3084)

On 05/03/2015 at 1:49pm - intimacy - by I pick em' good - United States

Today, I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. My mom's reaction was, I shit you not, to tell me to "walk it off". FML

#21403286
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30429) - you deserved it (2539)

On 05/02/2015 at 5:59am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, in the middle of the supermarket, my 7 year old son asked me what a cocksucker is and why his mum always calls me that. FML

#21402984
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29791) - you deserved it (3497)

On 05/01/2015 at 4:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, due to awkward circumstances, I am living with my ex-girlfriend and her new girlfriend. FML

Today, I asked my class to name some West African countries. Several of them thought Ebola was a country. I teach an AP history class. FML

#21400396
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35645) - you deserved it (3961)

On 04/27/2015 at 12:58am - work - by advanced history teacher (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for public sex. FML

#21399557
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41506) - you deserved it (3173)

On 04/25/2015 at 4:05pm - love - by RBergman - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I pulled up to a red light. My ex was in the next car, and my car's windows are so tinted that you can't see through them, so I flipped him off. I was driving my mom's car. FML

#21396485
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15237) - you deserved it (28968)

On 04/19/2015 at 9:39pm - love - by queenbitch - United States (Michigan)

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML



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