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garikay

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garikay

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garikay's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

#20428799
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22921) - you deserved it (45168) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/28/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by ELparano - Canada

Today, I set up a spy cam in my room to find out which one of my pervy brothers has been using my computer to watch porn. Turns out it was actually my father. I now have a video of him sitting in my chair masturbating, and I can't get it out of my head. FML

#20427916
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43631) - you deserved it (10737)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Malaysia (Selangor)

Today, while my girlfriend was playing a game on my phone, an unknown number sent me a nude picture and the words "Miss you, baby." This person's mistake just cost me a black eye, and probably my relationship too. FML

#20427797
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40130) - you deserved it (3883)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

#20427124
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38762) - you deserved it (7968)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29126) - you deserved it (7542)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today, I went to a urinal next to an elderly gentleman. As I was doing my business, he zips up and begins to leave. On his way out, he leans over my shoulder and whispers in my ear, "That's nice". FML

#20424687
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35629) - you deserved it (2848)

On 12/26/2012 at 11:03pm - misc - by hborkowski (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML

#20423697
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50594) - you deserved it (3541)

On 12/26/2012 at 2:30pm - misc - by gaggin - United States (California)

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

#20423578
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50265) - you deserved it (4735)

On 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was burgled while I was on the toilet. FML

#20402014
133 comments

Today, my boyfriend told me he couldn't spend the day with me as he had his grandmother's funeral. Lonely, I went shopping and I bumped into his mum having lunch with his 'dead' grandma. FML

#20401697
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33838) - you deserved it (2515)

On 12/16/2012 at 3:31am - love - by ghost? - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML

#20400784
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20153) - you deserved it (4250)

On 12/15/2012 at 1:43pm - misc - by oh gee, you don't say (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML

#20400604
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26559) - you deserved it (2018)

On 12/15/2012 at 10:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML

#20199403
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25085) - you deserved it (7243)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:32pm - money - by ihncredible - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than let him continue. FML

#20199068
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29529) - you deserved it (11220)

On 12/10/2012 at 1:37pm - intimacy - by hnickell93 - United States (California)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

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