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galactictoast13

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galactictoast13

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  • Number of visits : 1514
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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galactictoast13's favorite FMLs

Today, I was waiting to take a dump in a gas station restroom. A 300 pound man walked out, shook his head, and said "I'm sorry" to me. FML

#13675906
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32350) - you deserved it (3129)

On 11/01/2010 at 3:39pm - misc - by mr_p - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was waiting to take a dump in a gas station restroom. A 300 pound man walked out, shook his head, and said "I'm sorry" to me. FML

#13675906
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32350) - you deserved it (3129)

On 11/01/2010 at 3:39pm - misc - by mr_p - United States (Illinois)

Today, while working at McDonald's, a woman asked me what came on a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit. Trying not to laugh, I respond, "Bacon, egg, and cheese." She then realizes the stupidity of her question, and launches three dollars worth of quarters at my face and says, "Laugh at that, jerk." FML

#13212563
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31412) - you deserved it (5813)

On 09/26/2010 at 7:14pm - work - by lyssuhhhh (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was bored so I got my little brother's toy spaceship and a teddy bear, went to my room and started flying them around, having dog fights, making explosion noises and humming epic orchestral music. My mom opened my bedroom door, showing our new hot female neighbour around the house. I'm 19. FML

#13203283
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12693) - you deserved it (33163)

On 09/26/2010 at 12:10am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML

#12953032
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51328) - you deserved it (7788)

On 09/07/2010 at 7:48pm - kids - by uselessdad - Singapore

Today, I pulled a muscle in my arm while wiping my butt. FML

#12657778
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18202) - you deserved it (29243)

On 08/21/2010 at 2:09am - health - by clitorasaurus (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I pulled a muscle in my arm while wiping my butt. FML

#12657778
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18202) - you deserved it (29243)

On 08/21/2010 at 2:09am - health - by clitorasaurus (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I fell asleep and dreamed that I had won $500,000. In my dream, I used this money to buy a new MP3 Player, and then put the rest in a term deposit. Even in my dreams, I'm the most boring person I know. FML

#10448158
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28042) - you deserved it (7250)

On 05/10/2010 at 6:14am - money - by boring (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML

#9180721
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9780) - you deserved it (42478)

On 03/18/2010 at 4:21am - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML

#9070560
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23683) - you deserved it (10025)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:49am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while playing Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, my phone rang, and I instinctively tried to pick it up with the Force. I kept trying until it stopped ringing. FML

#8480132
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6044) - you deserved it (39901)

On 02/20/2010 at 2:04pm - misc - by analinguist (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got yelled at by one of my bosses. The reason? I was yawning. I work at Starbucks. Apparently I wasn't 'promoting' correctly. FML

#7467721
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23512) - you deserved it (4093)

On 01/21/2010 at 12:29am - work - by nichaneely (man) - United States (Tennessee)



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