gabriellemv

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gabriellemv

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 26 February 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2652
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About gabriellemv : Lazy, mostly.

gabriellemv's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

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gabriellemv's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend from high school at the exact pizza shop we met at where I worked in high school. She broke it off with me after she caught me cheating with her best friend. These days, she's a lawyer who makes six figures a year. I still work at the same pizza shop. FML

by PizzaBoySwag / 06/04/2011 at 5:36am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I noticed my hidden porn folder on my laptop had been renamed to "LOL". I live with my teenage daughter, and no one else. FML

by redhanded / 05/28/2011 at 5:24am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that the peaceful rain I'd been listening to all night was really a broken water-main flooding my entire yard. FML

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

by no one / 05/21/2011 at 5:07am / United States (Alaska) / Intimacy

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

by Mel / 05/07/2011 at 6:27pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, I had some hot phone sex with my long-distance girlfriend. Half-way through, my mom stormed in, and told me I was disgusting and sick for doing it in the same room as my brother. I forgot about the baby monitor. FML

by hornyloser / 05/02/2011 at 2:46pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I grabbed my t-shirt off the floor beside the bed and got up to walk my boyfriends dog. After several trips around the block and plenty of strange looks I got back upstairs and saw the used condom stuck to my sleeve from the night before. FML

by Username / 05/01/2011 at 4:20am / United States / Intimacy

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2011 at 9:46pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I heard the four most dreaded words known to man during my first time: "Is it in yet?" It was. FML

by Johntheladdo / 03/29/2011 at 1:26pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend tried to cure me of my snake phobia by buying one. When he took it out of the cage, it bit him. Now he's terrified of them too. Even worse, he dropped the snake, so it's now loose in our house. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2011 at 2:52pm / Macedonia (Struga) / Animals

Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2011 at 12:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I spent three and a half hours creating a Wikipedia page for myself. Three minutes after publishing, it was deleted due to me being a "Non-notable person nobody's ever heard of." FML

by shredded / 02/11/2011 at 7:26pm / United Kingdom (Richmond upon Thames) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had no choice but to shake the hand of a customer, who just moments before, had the aforementioned hand down the front of his pants, scratching his snowglobes. FML

by hushnow / 02/07/2011 at 1:04pm / United States / Work

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She's a sock puppet. FML

by seepeezy32 / 02/01/2011 at 9:32pm / Intimacy

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2011 at 3:09am / France / Animals