This member hasn't filled in the description.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22134) - you deserved it (1752)
On 11/10/2012 at 5:15am - love - by Helen - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I had to present a program to my supervisors in University. Not being a native English speaker, I used my own invented abbreviations for parameters in the program. Apparently STD is not an appropriate abbreviation for "standard deviation." I can still hear them laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15173) - you deserved it (6209)
On 11/09/2012 at 11:23am - work - by EnglishLearner (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)
Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31447) - you deserved it (1153)
On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my friend showed me a video of me in a nightclub. I was holding two Skittles vodka shots and shouting, "Red and green, merry Kwanzaa!" The shots were yellow and purple. I can't remember that night at all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5101) - you deserved it (14840)
Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20421) - you deserved it (1706)
On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)
Today, I started dating a seemingly normal guy. Not even four hours into our relationship, he began telling me that he can see spirits, dead people, and that I have a large black dog following me everywhere I go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15369) - you deserved it (1601)
On 11/08/2012 at 11:53pm - love - by holyshitbatman - United States (Ohio)
Today, my crazy bitch of a boss fired me for inappropriate conduct. Apparently my "fake Nazi accent" is "offensive to our Jewish coworkers." I'm German. I have no way to change the way I speak, or to pay this month's bills. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24202) - you deserved it (1052)
On 11/08/2012 at 11:02pm - work - by Screwed - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11753) - you deserved it (21443)
On 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by shit.... (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)
Today, despite my pleading, my boyfriend mounted a set of bullhorns above our headboard. Guess what came crashing down on our heads at 2am. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15889) - you deserved it (1688)
On 11/07/2012 at 10:44am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my girlfriend decided to invite her best friend over for a threesome. This would've been the best day ever, had I not been at work while it was taking place. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26587) - you deserved it (2259)
On 11/06/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by sadness1992 - United States (California)
Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "nope", and walked out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21567) - you deserved it (1650)
On 11/05/2012 at 2:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18440) - you deserved it (1726)
On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered "cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23695) - you deserved it (2245)
On 11/03/2012 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, after losing twenty pounds to please my husband, the only comment I received was, "At least now only your personality sucks." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22359) - you deserved it (3250)
On 11/02/2012 at 12:17am - love - by 123alleyesonme - United States (Texas)
Today, while studying liver pathology and highlighting important lines in my textbook, I realized that I could count the number of words I hadn't highlighted on one hand, over the last six pages. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11980) - you deserved it (7108)
On 11/01/2012 at 5:18pm - misc - by ThisisMedSchool - United States (Tennessee)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
