About g0dless : Just a bored teenager residing in Australia with too much spare time on her hands. Feel free to contact me to chat, I don't bite! But pls no creeps xo
g0dless's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
g0dless's favorite FMLs
by taintedlover / 05/13/2014 at 5:31pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by Anonymous / 01/31/2014 at 5:08pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by limping / 01/24/2014 at 6:10pm / Canada / Kids
Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML
by I hate that game / 11/23/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (Wigan) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/21/2013 at 7:18pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love
by StrandedWhale / 11/03/2013 at 2:21am / United Kingdom / Love
Today, I found out that my brother is adamant that if he records silence, then listens to said silence at full volume, it'll improve the headphones' noise-blocking abilities. I live with a complete idiot. FML
by Eggs6131 / 10/15/2013 at 9:09am / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Miscellaneous
Today, in revenge for me pulling the old salt-in-the-soda prank on him, my dad showed up at my college dressed in a tight blouse and miniskirt, demanding that I come home early with him. I think I'm going to be lynched next time I go to class. FML
by HSampsON / 10/13/2013 at 5:20pm / Niger (Niamey) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML
by not getting laid / 10/13/2013 at 10:38am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML
by SerenityJ / 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML
by Madster15 / 09/15/2013 at 2:05am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals
by Anonymous / 09/04/2013 at 1:28pm / United States (South Dakota) / Health
by Anonymous / 08/26/2013 at 4:17pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, I forgot my key inside my apartment. My boyfriend suggested we ask a neighbor to open it. I explained we don't all have the same key, to which he responded, "Well how come they all have the same doorknobs?" FML
by Anonymous / 08/12/2013 at 7:58pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by nutfreak / 08/12/2013 at 11:24am / United States (Maryland) / Health