Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

g0dless

Offline (the 11/15/2014 at 1:04pm) | Search for a member

g0dless

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 April 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1184
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About g0dless : Just a bored teenager residing in Australia with too much spare time on her hands. Feel free to contact me to chat, I don't bite! But pls no creeps xo

g0dless's page activity

Visits<b>Lct1196</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 8:56pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 11:52am<b>sajupt</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 2:29pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 7:34pm<b>Jthewat</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 7:22pm<b>Arieslink</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 5:45pm<b>sybyabraham</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 9:02pm<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 4:47pm<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 6:41pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 2:23pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 3:28am<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 7:35am<b>drumguy218</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 11:16am<b>EmoKnife</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 3:19pm<b>Shot_Caller3</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 10:12pm<b>LifeMD</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 4:02am<b>Morqan_Freeman</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 11:13am<b>tararochelle</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 7:18am

Liked!<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 5:52pm

g0dless's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of g0dless's badges

g0dless's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend admitted to my best friend that she basically just sees me as a dildo with annoying emotions. FML

#21138864
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51742) - you deserved it (7006)

On 05/13/2014 at 5:31pm - love - by taintedlover (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my evening was shot to hell when I found my pregnant wife on the floor, sobbing because we'd run out of cheese sticks. FML

#21046394
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43235) - you deserved it (8217)

On 01/31/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, in revenge for being grounded for bullying a kid at school, my eight-year-old son flung a handful of Lego in my path as I walked barefoot into the kitchen. I'm still in pain. 5ML

#21038562
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41349) - you deserved it (8165)

On 01/24/2014 at 6:10pm - kids - by limping (man) - Canada

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

#20967834
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59578) - you deserved it (4306)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)

Today, in my second year at university, I took a pregnancy test. It is the only test I've passed all month. FML

#20966092
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32265) - you deserved it (46857)

On 11/21/2013 at 7:18pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé stood by laughing his ass off as I repeatedly tried to stand up, only to be knocked back down again. I'm seven months pregnant. FML

#20943386
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67520) - you deserved it (4671)

On 11/03/2013 at 2:21am - love - by StrandedWhale (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my brother is adamant that if he records silence, then listens to said silence at full volume, it'll improve the headphones' noise-blocking abilities. I live with a complete idiot. FML

#20921378
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37617) - you deserved it (2915)

On 10/15/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by Eggs6131 (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, in revenge for me pulling the old salt-in-the-soda prank on him, my dad showed up at my college dressed in a tight blouse and miniskirt, demanding that I come home early with him. I think I'm going to be lynched next time I go to class. FML

#20919140
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36394) - you deserved it (12281)

On 10/13/2013 at 5:20pm - misc - by HSampsON (man) - Niger (Niamey)

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

#20918730
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21626) - you deserved it (81515)

On 10/13/2013 at 10:38am - love - by not getting laid - United States (Texas)

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48788) - you deserved it (6381)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, my entire gym class had to run the 1600 with our coach calling out finishing times. My finishing time was reported as "3 days short of a year." FML

#20867471
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39520) - you deserved it (6677)

On 09/04/2013 at 1:28pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (South Dakota)

Today, half-way through my trip to Florida, I received a call from my friend of six years. "I sort of had sex with your girlfriend while you were gone." He said it "just sort of happened." FML

#20855295
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56272) - you deserved it (4071)

On 08/26/2013 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I forgot my key inside my apartment. My boyfriend suggested we ask a neighbor to open it. I explained we don't all have the same key, to which he responded, "Well how come they all have the same doorknobs?" FML

#20834278
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42059) - you deserved it (4705)

On 08/12/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was diagnosed with severe nut allergies. My dad decided to buy jars of Nutella, write "You know you want this" on them, and stick them around the house. FML

#20833620
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47367) - you deserved it (3212)

On 08/12/2013 at 11:24am - health - by nutfreak (man) - United States (Maryland)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: