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frokeyman92

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frokeyman92
  • Town/Country : Lake Charles, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 771
  • Number of comments : 76
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About frokeyman92 : 11b, CEH, and gamer. Whatssss uppppp..

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frokeyman92's favorite FMLs

Today, I found a tiny, featherless baby bird. I knew it was impossible, but I tried to keep it alive through the day. Before I could get it to the wildlife center, it died, and when I got all choked up over it, my mom started laughing at me and saying how "weak" I was. FML

#20077707
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21087) - you deserved it (3788)

On 09/18/2012 at 12:19pm - animals - by Birdwatcher (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, at school, a guy walked up to me and said I look a little too young to be at high school. I told him that I'm sixteen years old. He stared at my chest for several long seconds, muttered "What the fuck?" and walked off. FML

#20076675
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23574) - you deserved it (2180)

On 09/17/2012 at 7:14pm - misc - by wtf yourself, cunt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I saw a small bug on the wall, so I decided to send it straight to the insect afterlife by smashing it with a book. The book crushed it, and caused my clock to come free from the wall and crash down onto my TV. FML

#20075179
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7951) - you deserved it (14579) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/16/2012 at 6:50pm - animals - by romainmain - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37713) - you deserved it (2943)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, an unknown number left me a lengthy voicemail of what sounds like two people having sex. This is the closest I've gotten to real-life sex in 2 years. I listened to it three times. FML

#20058325
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22688) - you deserved it (8014)

On 09/05/2012 at 12:44am - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I bought a pack of toothpicks. There were 500 of them. When I got home I accidentally dropped the pack. After twenty long minutes of picking them up, I dropped them again. FML

#20042606
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20310) - you deserved it (10212)

On 08/26/2012 at 12:20pm - misc - by S. (woman) - Estonia

Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML

#20037909
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32231) - you deserved it (9797) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by thekriss - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had to shave my feet in order to wear ballet flats. I'm not a hobbit. FML

#20037324
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17419) - you deserved it (2684)

On 08/23/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by fet (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML

#20035502
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16104) - you deserved it (5542)

On 08/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by Minecraftwhyyy (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I was pretty upset, so one of my guy friends offered to comfort me and get some ice cream. Apparently his definition of "comforting" is to feel my tits and try to get me to give him head. FML

#20034633
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25301) - you deserved it (3791)

On 08/21/2012 at 9:59pm - intimacy - by m (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

#20012782
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23067) - you deserved it (12150)

On 08/10/2012 at 1:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, I slammed the car door on my head while I was getting in the car. If that wasn't bad enough, my boyfriend is convinced I now have a concussion and insists on waking me up every hour to make sure I'm still alive. FML

#20001841
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16103) - you deserved it (4825)

On 08/04/2012 at 5:33am - health - by MAC. - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to turn down an offer of what seemed like some sexy time with a cute girl because my intestines were bursting with an intense desire to unleash molten lava. I rushed home to squat down, only to let out a disappointingly small piece of crud and a tiny fart. FML

#19984638
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25985) - you deserved it (4863)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Jarman (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

#19602885
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16304) - you deserved it (4073)

On 05/10/2012 at 3:14pm - misc - by Amy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

#19554232
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8029) - you deserved it (53123)

On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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