frokeyman92

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Offline (the 07/07/2015 at 9:27pm)

frokeyman92

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1548
  • Number of comments : 77
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About frokeyman92 : 11b, CEH, and gamer. Whatssss uppppp..

frokeyman92's page activity

Visits<b>Dalboz</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 2:03pm<b>pokehmahn</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 2:23pm<b>Katdurin</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 6:24pm<b>xlasxtchanxce13</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 8:32pm<b>deathmec</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 1:47pm<b>PremiumWhale</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 4:53pm<b>guss5441</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 1:46am<b>alexisisabel17</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 3:23pm<b>Farklez</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 11:08pm<b>Ademiary7411</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 8:05am<b>De_Belgian</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 4:15pm<b>Bloodcalibur</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 3:59pm<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 3:43pm<b>INDYSTRUCTABLE</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 2:29pm<b>XxWolfQueen</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 1:33am<b>grogers311</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 11:57am<b>Rizzen</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 1:27pm<b>lmr322</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 9:08pm

Fucked!<b>guss5441</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 7:45am

frokeyman92's FML badges

The Mixer

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frokeyman92's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandpa told me he was going to be eating out tonight, and I asked at which restaurant. He replied "Your gran's room." and winked. I didn't need that mental image, at all. FML

by -_- / 05/13/2015 at 12:00pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to work at my job as a CNA at a long-term care facility. I'm also on a medication that has a side effect of confusion. I had 3 residents with Alzheimer's tell me to 'get my shit together.' FML

by Basically_ / 05/11/2015 at 5:24pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I learned I'm claustrophobic by having a raging oh-god-I'm-gonna-fucking-die panic attack while I was stuck inside an MRI scanner. FML

by birchbeer / 05/11/2015 at 3:39pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML

by LoveGlove / 06/21/2014 at 5:42pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I found a tiny, featherless baby bird. I knew it was impossible, but I tried to keep it alive through the day. Before I could get it to the wildlife center, it died, and when I got all choked up over it, my mom started laughing at me and saying how "weak" I was. FML

by Birdwatcher / 09/18/2012 at 12:19pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, at school, a guy walked up to me and said I look a little too young to be at high school. I told him that I'm sixteen years old. He stared at my chest for several long seconds, muttered "What the fuck?" and walked off. FML

by wtf yourself, cunt / 09/17/2012 at 7:14pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a small bug on the wall, so I decided to send it straight to the insect afterlife by smashing it with a book. The book crushed it, and caused my clock to come free from the wall and crash down onto my TV. FML

by romainmain / 09/16/2012 at 6:50pm / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Animals

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, an unknown number left me a lengthy voicemail of what sounds like two people having sex. This is the closest I've gotten to real-life sex in 2 years. I listened to it three times. FML

by anonymous / 09/05/2012 at 12:44am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I bought a pack of toothpicks. There were 500 of them. When I got home I accidentally dropped the pack. After twenty long minutes of picking them up, I dropped them again. FML

by S. / 08/26/2012 at 12:20pm / Estonia / Miscellaneous

Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML

by thekriss / 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm / Love

Today, I had to shave my feet in order to wear ballet flats. I'm not a hobbit. FML

by fet / 08/23/2012 at 10:30am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML

by Minecraftwhyyy / 08/22/2012 at 11:13am / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I was pretty upset, so one of my guy friends offered to comfort me and get some ice cream. Apparently his definition of "comforting" is to feel my tits and try to get me to give him head. FML

by m / 08/21/2012 at 9:59pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2012 at 1:29am / Europe / Intimacy