flores_daniel

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flores_daniel

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 862
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About flores_daniel : Well I am just your average American soldier. Just here to post stuff about me and read others shitty FML's. My day gets brighter when I see others are having a more shittier day than I. Thank you everyone.

flores_daniel's page activity

Visits<b>zoPwNAgEzo</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 5:19am<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 12:14am<b>James64138</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 3:22pm<b>CooKieMoNstEr154</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 9:29am<b>marinus</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 2:40am<b>appelflap</b> - the 04/09/2013 at 7:03pm<b>karlcolt45</b> - the 04/08/2013 at 5:06pm<b>B5B0N35</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 3:01pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 03/20/2013 at 6:01pm

flores_daniel's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of flores_daniel's badges

flores_daniel's favorite FMLs

Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2013 at 6:22pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheered for us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement died down, she leaned over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2013 at 5:17am / Love

Today, I walked in on my brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning how to spend the day together. When I suggested we start off with some fun in bed, then get some pizza and play his favorite video game, he sighed, "Can't we just go straight to gaming?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2013 at 4:16pm / United States / Love

Today, I had phone sex with my boyfriend. He had an asthma attack. FML

by JRLJLS / 04/15/2013 at 5:09am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML

by drama king? / 04/10/2013 at 6:17pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I was proposed to, under the condition that I "get thin" first. FML

by ziggers10 / 04/06/2013 at 11:19pm / United States / Love

Today, I was discussing possible career choices with my relatives. Pretty much everyone expressed the belief that I'm screwed for life, with my grandma commenting later: "She ain't even got the tits for porn. God help her." FML

by flea-bitten / 04/06/2013 at 3:41pm / United States / Work

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML

by dating walter white's gf apparently / 04/06/2013 at 3:13pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I was watching a movie with my parents when a sex scene came on. As if that wasn't awkward enough, they started making out on the couch behind me. FML

by ohgodwhy / 04/06/2013 at 10:15am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was freshening up my makeup in the car before a date. An old lady walked by and said through my open window, "Don't bother. There's no helping you, honey." FML

by f-ugly / 03/25/2013 at 2:36pm / United States / Love

Today, I was late to a lecture when I tripped up the stairs. With a few hundred people already staring and laughing at me, I started to curtsy to my "adoring fans" but instead fell backwards down the massive flight of stairs. FML

by Anonymous / 03/25/2013 at 2:03am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave my son a fork, so I could try teaching him how to eat with one. So far, he's been doing all the teaching. He's taught me that if I get anywhere near him when he has a fork, I'll get shanked. FML

by Gixie / 03/24/2013 at 11:56am / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2013 at 7:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I finally got the courage to tell the girl I like how I really feel about her, due in no small part to how flirty she's been towards me lately. Turns out she's really just a skank and was trying to make my best friend "jealous". He's gay. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2013 at 4:43pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Love