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flipstar530

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flipstar530
  • Town/Country : Carmel, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 25 December 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 493
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About flipstar530 : I love animals and cats especially. I love young children. I\'m not really a peoples person and I hate spiders:)

flipstar530's last visitors

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flipstar530's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

flipstar530's favorite FMLs

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML

#17664853
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21570) - you deserved it (8413)

On 09/04/2011 at 9:27pm - love - by ddll (man) - Singapore

Today, my 5 year old fish died. As I was flushing him, he started swimming again. FML

#17371338
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37018) - you deserved it (6968)

On 08/04/2011 at 9:47pm - animals - by dukebluedevils13 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mom decided to give me a bloodcurdlingly graphic sex talk. On a plane. I'm 23. FML

#17343127
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26025) - you deserved it (2218)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:26pm - misc - by jared77 - United States (Texas)

Today, my best friend told me to face my fear of cows and hop over the fence in with them. This resulted in me being chased by a raging cow, and thrusting myself head first over a fence. FML

#17087035
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18582) - you deserved it (12789)

On 07/12/2011 at 11:13pm - animals - by MooCow - United States (Montana)

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9677) - you deserved it (41814)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up with bowel problems which have been causing me to violently pass wind every couple of minutes. I have to spend the next two hours sitting an exam in dead silence. FML

#16607175
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30517) - you deserved it (2670)

On 06/11/2011 at 4:48am - health - by pleasestop (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

#16126004
249 comments

Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. His partly digested nachos decided to make an appearance halfway through. FML

#15809243
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35443) - you deserved it (3324)

On 04/16/2011 at 3:18pm - love - by ColdHeat (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I attended a funeral. During the minute of silence, my phone went off. My ringtone is "It's good to be alive". FML

#15616538
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16402) - you deserved it (41606)

On 04/03/2011 at 3:02am - misc - by JJMan217 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34811) - you deserved it (30430)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML

#15079652
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18716) - you deserved it (30457)

On 02/22/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by CutieBooty (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

#14806356
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38001) - you deserved it (7384)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States

Today, I went to Starbucks to use the bathroom. After I knocked on the door, and turned the handle, this little old lady rips the door open and goes "I WAS TAKING A DUMP. YOU WANNA COME IN AND WIPE MY SHIT? DO YOU?!" and then continued to ask me the same question for five minutes. FML

#8878424
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24570) - you deserved it (3615)

On 03/06/2010 at 9:38pm - misc - by bathroomblunder (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I took my girlfriend out bowling. The place was not only packed, but on my very first attempt, I stumbled and landed flat on my "sugarbuns" about 6 feet down the lane. Everyone pointed and laughed hysterically, including my girlfriend, who was on the floor almost in tears, enjoying my pain. FML

#8479975
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16362) - you deserved it (8137)

On 02/20/2010 at 1:58pm - misc - by moobysrocks - United States

Today, I went to a petting zoo with my niece and nephew. While we were checking out the llamas, one of them spit directly into my face. Disgusted and embarrassed, we turned away to pet a deer. The deer immediately urinated then shook its tail which splattered it into my face. FML

#6202329
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24171) - you deserved it (2172)

On 11/07/2009 at 9:13pm - misc - by shando - United States (Nevada)



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