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fledermausi

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fledermausi
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  • Number of visits : 187
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

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fledermausi's favorite FMLs

Today, while playing spin the bottle, my two spins landed on two really pretty girls. The first girl I missed and kissed her chin. The second girl I headbutted and gave a nosebleed. FML

#7258041
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8937) - you deserved it (28087)

On 01/10/2010 at 1:13pm - love - by Olihime (man) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

#6937557
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24890) - you deserved it (5491)

On 12/25/2009 at 11:15am - kids - by BathroomMuch (man) - United States (California)

Today, I gave my wife her anniversary card. She started to giggle then walked in our bedroom and came back with the exact same card from last year. This is the second time I've done this. FML

#6881233
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6020) - you deserved it (22084)

On 12/22/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by todayJman03 (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was pulling into a parking garage space and using the next car over to judge where the wall was in front of me, but ended up whumping my front bumper as I pulled forward. Wondering what had happened, I got out to see that the car I was aligning myself against had hit the wall too. FML

#6703564
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5612) - you deserved it (18332)

On 12/11/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that my father asked my best friend to marry him. He's 38 and we're 18. She said yes. FML

#6593768
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44846) - you deserved it (1992)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while at a hotel for vacation with my brother and his wife, I was watching their two-month old daughter in the waterpark when a woman came up to me and said, "Aww your kid is so adorable! Don't worry, you'll get your figure back in no time." I'm a fourteen year old girl. FML

#6501685
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32271) - you deserved it (3576)

On 11/28/2009 at 9:14pm - kids - by Shannon (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML

#6427475
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5597) - you deserved it (16969)

On 11/23/2009 at 9:30pm - love - by pigglepigglepiggle (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML

#6316031
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50314) - you deserved it (2659)

On 11/15/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was shopping with my baby daughter when an older woman came up to me. She glared and said, "You know, if you kids learned how to keep your legs closed, you wouldn't be a mother at 16." I'm 25. FML

#6288438
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31557) - you deserved it (3115)

On 11/13/2009 at 3:26pm - kids - by notateen (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got an email from the company that manages my Cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML

#5663418
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40784) - you deserved it (2979)

On 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm - animals - by APetsPet (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with the cliché of the diamond ring in a champagne glass. Apparently there was an off-duty police officer across the room watching me slip the ring into the glass. He thought I was slipping in a date-rape drug and tackled me down before I could propose. FML

#5494730
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41213) - you deserved it (2794)

On 09/26/2009 at 10:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him by handing me a ring and telling me, "Okay we're engaged now." I should have seen it coming when we started dating, I went to his house one night and as I was leaving he said, "Okay you're my girlfriend now." FML

#5407615
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32011) - you deserved it (11976)

On 09/22/2009 at 12:27am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I walked into the kitchen and saw a note my roomate posted. As I got close to read it I was attacked by a very pissed off cat. The note said "Left window open last night, stray cat got in. Watch out he isn't friendly." FML

#4977727
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35045) - you deserved it (2108)

On 09/01/2009 at 2:51pm - animals - by Catscratch (man) - United States (California)



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