flea_of_death

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flea_of_death

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 May 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 18914
  • Number of comments : 91
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About flea_of_death : This thing changes all the time. Okay, as of July 2013, here's my about me! I do enjoy My Little Pony, but I won't shove it in your face. It's just something I like! I'm going to be majoring in pre-vet medicine when I start college this fall, and I will be in the Pride of the Southland Marching Band. Look them up on Youtube, it's worth it. I don't comment often on here, but when I do, I'm normally defending ponies, making a witty comment, or saying something creepy. That's just who I am. =) Feel free to message me, though I don't respond very often due to mostly using the mobile app. Which is why if a comment seems out of place, my phone freaked out. I'm rambling right now because it's 2:30 in the morning as I type this. Have a cookie if you read this far. Have a wonderful day!

flea_of_death's page activity

Visits<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 4:27pm<b>SleepyPharma</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 3:12pm<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 7:06am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 1:15am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 11:21pm<b>DarkMatter115</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 9:58am<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 3:47pm<b>ColdRoxas</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 5:30pm<b>ajean97</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 8:05pm<b>Sexomancer</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:36am<b>EyesofStone</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 10:50am<b>lion2294</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 2:21am<b>Supersid333</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 12:26pm<b>Ashd09</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 10:01pm<b>txchic</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 4:36pm<b>lVluse</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 10:27am<b>MinerZ</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 10:51pm<b>Crlnprz</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 3:09pm

Fucked!<b>lion2294</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 8:22am

flea_of_death's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

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flea_of_death's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my mom I was finally going on a diet. She let me know how proud she is of me fighting temptation, by making my favorite cookies and dinner. FML

by Anonymous / 06/06/2012 at 12:25pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML

by Rob / 06/06/2012 at 12:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML

by Rob / 06/06/2012 at 12:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

by Bishop / 06/06/2012 at 10:19am / Transportation

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

by Bishop / 06/06/2012 at 10:19am / Transportation

Today, my mother is trying to convince me to divorce my husband. He has a tattoo of a skull on his shoulder and she believes this means he kills people. FML

by facepalm / 06/06/2012 at 4:06am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my mother is trying to convince me to divorce my husband. He has a tattoo of a skull on his shoulder and she believes this means he kills people. FML

by facepalm / 06/06/2012 at 4:06am / United States (California) / Love

Today, instead of having my friends come pick me up, my dad drove me over to visit them. He insisted on walking me up to the door, hugging me goodbye, and making sure my friends were appropriate enough to hang out with. I'm in college. FML

by that girl. / 06/06/2012 at 1:26am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my father-in-law called me an idiot for buying him coffee cake because he can't have caffeine. He refuses to believe that there's as much coffee in coffee cake as there is ham in a hamburger. FML

by 635CSi / 06/06/2012 at 1:23am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I realized my paranoia is really bad when I saw my coworker holding a knife and immediately began thinking of ways to keep him from stabbing me. I work in a restaurant kitchen. FML

by Jonas / 06/06/2012 at 1:00am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my uncle gave me a lecture on how I eat too much "unhealthy" junk food, and that it can be very harmful for me. All the while smoking a cigarette. FML

by Singapore / 06/05/2012 at 10:59pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, it was the last day of school, and I said goodbye to one of my students. She then told me how to correctly pronounce her name. I'd said it wrong all year. FML

by Mark / 06/05/2012 at 10:21pm / United States / Work

Today, I was talking on the phone to my crush so I went into the bathroom for some privacy. My drunk mother started banging on the door, asking what I was doing in there. I told her that I was on the phone, so she yelled super loud, "While you're shitting?" He immediately hung up. FML

by whyme27 / 06/05/2012 at 9:19pm / United States (Indiana) / Love

Today, I got a bikini wax. They said it wouldn't hurt too badly, and that it would just sting. My friend heard me screaming from all the way down the hall in the waiting room. FML

by higgles15 / 06/05/2012 at 3:42pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to take my shirt off. It was an awkward fit, so I had to basically wrestle it for five minutes. The kicker was that I was giving my boyfriend a striptease. He laughed so hard and for so long that we never had sex. FML

by Damn / 06/05/2012 at 3:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy