About flea_of_death : Okay, editing this now that I'm on a computer and don't have to worry about autocorrect. First off, I don't care if you love me or hate me. I'll say what I want to say. Second, I'm busy with school, so if you message me and I don't respond for a while, please don't be offended! Third, I rarely comment because I hate dealing with dumb people. Anything else, feel free to message me!
The Thumb returns
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
Today, I farted in front of my husband. It somehow turned into a farting war. Then I realized this is the closest we've come to intimacy in a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17643) - you deserved it (4445)
On 02/28/2012 at 6:55am - love - by Susan - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I farted in front of my husband. It somehow turned into a farting war. Then I realized this is the closest we've come to intimacy in a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17643) - you deserved it (4445)
On 02/28/2012 at 6:55am - love - by Susan - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I farted in front of my husband. It somehow turned into a farting war. Then I realized this is the closest we've come to intimacy in a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17643) - you deserved it (4445)
On 02/28/2012 at 6:55am - love - by Susan - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mother surprised me with a new alarm clock. It's attached to a toy car which races around my room with obnoxious sirens going at full blast until I crawl out of bed and turn it off. She says this will be a regular thing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14481) - you deserved it (8476)
On 02/28/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by poop - United States
Today, I was eating a meatball sub when a meatball fell out and rolled into my hair and all down my shirt. I couldn't find the missing meatball anywhere. I found it later, in my handbag. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16386) - you deserved it (2785)
On 02/28/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by malloreigh (woman) - Australia
Today, I was eating a meatball sub when a meatball fell out and rolled into my hair and all down my shirt. I couldn't find the missing meatball anywhere. I found it later, in my handbag. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16386) - you deserved it (2785)
On 02/28/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by malloreigh (woman) - Australia
Today, I was eating a meatball sub when a meatball fell out and rolled into my hair and all down my shirt. I couldn't find the missing meatball anywhere. I found it later, in my handbag. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16386) - you deserved it (2785)
On 02/28/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by malloreigh (woman) - Australia
Today, I was eating a meatball sub when a meatball fell out and rolled into my hair and all down my shirt. I couldn't find the missing meatball anywhere. I found it later, in my handbag. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16386) - you deserved it (2785)
On 02/28/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by malloreigh (woman) - Australia
Today, I ordered Chinese food. As I approached the restaurant to pick it up, I took out my keys and tried to unlock the front door. By the time I realized my mistake, everyone inside the restaurant had noticed and started laughing at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8451) - you deserved it (13440)
On 02/27/2012 at 4:58pm - misc - by Eric - United States
Today, I ordered Chinese food. As I approached the restaurant to pick it up, I took out my keys and tried to unlock the front door. By the time I realized my mistake, everyone inside the restaurant had noticed and started laughing at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8451) - you deserved it (13440)
On 02/27/2012 at 4:58pm - misc - by Eric - United States
Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (127) - you deserved it (2727)
On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom
Today, I was very cold and tired, so I took a shower to warm up and went to bed. The minute I hopped into bed, it collapsed and broke. I have spent half-an-hour rearranging furniture to get the mattress on to the floor. Now I'm cold again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15580) - you deserved it (2049)
On 02/27/2012 at 7:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was very cold and tired, so I took a shower to warm up and went to bed. The minute I hopped into bed, it collapsed and broke. I have spent half-an-hour rearranging furniture to get the mattress on to the floor. Now I'm cold again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15580) - you deserved it (2049)
On 02/27/2012 at 7:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I woke up with the worst vaginal itching and swelling. I then find out it was brought on by my boyfriend's cheap brand of toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18178) - you deserved it (2856)
On 02/27/2012 at 7:29am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I had to ask my boyfriend to stop measuring his penis during our conversation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18976) - you deserved it (2665)
On 02/27/2012 at 6:06am - intimacy - by facepalm (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
