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Who’s the fairest of them all?
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flames57323's favorite FMLs
by anonymous / 11/04/2014 at 7:03am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by jay-frey96 / 11/02/2014 at 10:36am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/30/2014 at 4:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML
by Anonymous / 08/27/2014 at 5:50pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/18/2013 at 11:56pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/19/2013 at 12:12pm / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML
by more than I wanted to know / 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm / Italy (Emilia-Romagna) / Intimacy
by inyobeddd / 05/02/2013 at 4:27am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML
by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 2:41pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by iLynz / 04/23/2013 at 2:34am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/17/2013 at 1:39am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by NiquetChrome / 04/14/2013 at 7:18pm / France / Miscellaneous
Today, I was supervising some kids, who were playing on a bouncy castle. One of them managed to kick me in the face during a jump, and looking for an apology, I asked, "What do you say?" He paused, then shouted, "HEADSHOTTTTT!" FML
by xx-look-at-xx / 04/12/2013 at 8:14pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Kids
Today, I came home from a relaxing, peaceful vacation. When I got home my 4-year-old son was free-balling with poop all over his body, screaming "Bob the Builder will kick your ass." The baby sitter is nowhere to be found and I can't get him to stop saying, "I love ass." FML
by Anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 4:00am / United States (California) / Holidays
Today, I spent three hours painstakingly installing and configuring some parental control software on my 11-year-old son's laptop after I caught him watching porn. Barely an hour after returning the laptop, I caught him watching yet more porn on it. FML
by Anonymous / 03/24/2013 at 6:30am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids
- Today, I found out my hours at work were getting cut and given to another employee. Not only are my… Today, I finally went to talk to my neighbour upstairs. He is always throwing his cigarette buts on… Today my manager tried to force me to sign an employee contract (I've worked here a year) that she…