firstworldissues

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firstworldissues

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 3143
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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firstworldissues's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 8:54am<b>citrusfruit</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 10:34pm<b>CameronWilkins</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 2:52pm<b>rate</b> - the 02/18/2009 at 2:09pm

firstworldissues's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

firstworldissues's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

by Shamu / 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML

by alhummel21 / 02/12/2009 at 2:45am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was tutoring kids at an elementary school. One kid messed up my hair. I said, "Why'd you do that??" He said, "I have lice, now you have lice too!" FML

by imalilangel05 / 02/10/2009 at 10:08am / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, on the crowded train, a cute guy called me over and told me to stand next to him because there were less people there. We started talking, but he left before I could get his number. Just when I was about to tell my friends about it, I find out that he stole my phone. FML

by touched / 02/10/2009 at 6:30am / Philippines (Rizal) / Transportation

Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don't have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired. FML

by maxthndr / 02/10/2009 at 12:36am / United States / Work

Today, I was talking with some of my friends who are girls. They were all complaining about how there was no good boys left to ask to the Sadie Hawkins Dance. Hoping for an invite I mentioned I was still availiable. They just laughed at me and invited me to come dress shopping with them. FML

by Noname / 02/09/2009 at 6:47pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, this guy took me to Denny's on a first date and used a 2 for 1 coupon. It was expired. I paid. FML

by Nator / 02/09/2009 at 10:31am / United States (District of Columbia) / Love

Today, for our 8 month anniversary, my boyfriend bought me a hideous necklace with ugly charms hanging off it. I wore it anyway and got a rash from it on the side of my neck. After seeing the rash my boyfriend accused me of having a hickey from another guy and broke up with me. FML

by Jenny / 02/08/2009 at 11:10pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML

by Noname / 02/06/2009 at 2:23pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML

by Noname / 02/06/2009 at 2:23pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML

by Noname / 02/06/2009 at 2:23pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my car covered in shaving cream and tampons and the word CHEATER written on my windshield in lipstick. The guy a few doors down from me in my dorm has the same car as me. I'm a virgin. FML

by CB4 / 02/05/2009 at 5:34pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I woke up to my car covered in shaving cream and tampons and the word CHEATER written on my windshield in lipstick. The guy a few doors down from me in my dorm has the same car as me. I'm a virgin. FML

by CB4 / 02/05/2009 at 5:34pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I woke up to my car covered in shaving cream and tampons and the word CHEATER written on my windshield in lipstick. The guy a few doors down from me in my dorm has the same car as me. I'm a virgin. FML

by CB4 / 02/05/2009 at 5:34pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML

by #201 / 02/05/2009 at 8:23am / United States (Florida) / Animals