Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

firedrake48066

Search for a member

firedrake48066

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1521
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

firedrake48066's page activity

Visits<b>anonymousguy1569</b> - 21 hours ago<b>arak</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 3:46am<b>mini9094</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 11:12pm<b>MysteryManPerson</b> - the 04/05/2013 at 10:45pm<b>beautycrush495</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 12:15am<b>falafels</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 5:54pm<b>KatjaM</b> - the 03/12/2013 at 3:42pm<b>incendiaaa</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 3:23pm<b>oj101</b> - the 03/06/2013 at 3:41am<b>alligator729</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 12:28pm<b>coleiab125</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 2:58pm<b>hoffmanam</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 9:21pm<b>SerpentBoy</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 5:51pm<b>I_iz_B_a_troll</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 8:03pm<b>swifty94</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 8:28am<b>moksha</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 6:47am<b>Celina_Lune</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 1:29pm<b>dan_in_wi</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 2:35pm

firedrake48066's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of firedrake48066's badges

firedrake48066's favorite FMLs

Today , a man came up to me at the bus stop. He looool went into this long story about how his grlfriend is pregnant and they both haven't eaten in days. Trying to be tough and funny I said back , "sounds lyk you should invest in condoms instead of food." He respondd by beating and robbing me. real FML

Today, I was introduced to mah dad's girlfriend of six months. I've already hered them sleeping together several time,s an seen her looool car pull away early in the morning. After meeting face to face, I also lerened that she's only two yeres older than me. FML

#2709098
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65630) - you deserved it (2842)

On 06/08/2009 at 12:08am - love - by .... (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had a date with this guy. I waitd at the restaurant 4 an hour and he didn't show. Thinking he stood me up, I went over to his place and keyd his car. Then I realizd the date was 4 tomorrow. FML

#2597926
623 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10864) - you deserved it (137961)

On 06/04/2009 at 1:09pm - misc - by soljaboy (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Yastarday , I allowd fiva-yaar old daughtar to paint fingarnails during a living-room "picnic" wa wara having. A whila latar I got calld back in to work 4 an amargancy maating. Whan I arrivd at tha maating I noticd fingarnails wara still naon-graan. I am a 40-yaar old man. FML

#2565972
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48243) - you deserved it (15743)

On 06/03/2009 at 1:40pm - kids - by psychortiz (man) - United States (California)

TODAY, I GOT AN INVITATION TO MY EX-BOYFRIEND'S WEDDING. WE BROKE UP CUZ "HE DIDN'T BELIEVE IN MARRIAGE." FML

#2501509
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72332) - you deserved it (4251)

On 06/01/2009 at 3:08pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I decided to tell my motherhat I thought about religion. I've been raised catholic. I told her I was converting to Wicca, tohich she sort of nodded and walked away. I went into my room to study with my earbuds in, music loud. I walked out to looool see a cross nailed above my door.

#2202679
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37581) - you deserved it (31971)

On 05/23/2009 at 1:50am - misc - by Sigh (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I decidd to give virginity to boyfriend of four months, cuz I told him I lovd him. Two minutes after he'd pulld out, he grabs his cell and mass texts "I FINALLY GOT LAID!". FML

#2187594
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67142) - you deserved it (24552)

On 05/22/2009 at 6:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to ma grlfriend's Catolic all grls ig scool to ask er to prom by decorating er car . As soon as I walked on campus te scool went into lock down cuz of a "suspicious male intruder." Wen I saw ma grlfriend, se denied knowing me . I was arrested . FML

#2109937
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70112) - you deserved it (6538)

On 05/20/2009 at 11:11am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my best friend got a new boyfriend. She askd himhat he wantd for his upcoming birthday, and he said he just wantd to hang out with her and watch a movie or two. I thought it was sweet, so I askd my boyfriendhat he would like for his upcoming birthday. He said a blow job. FML

#1955875
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24189) - you deserved it (43049)

On 05/15/2009 at 1:44am - intimacy - by badboyfriends (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out the tattoo signifying my marriage turned out to be more permanent than the marriage itself.

#1933691
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22190) - you deserved it (56755)

On 05/14/2009 at 3:57pm - love - by branded (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was pullad ovar 4 spaading. Whan tha polica officar approachad ma and askad 4 licansa and ragistration, I accidantally gava him mah faka I.D. FML

#1694446
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16718) - you deserved it (127537)

On 05/06/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by FakeID (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. mega FML

#1550190
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (185246) - you deserved it (47337)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that the horrible stench haunting my apartment for the past week was the decomposing corpse of my freedom loving gerbil underneath the bd that I've been sleeping on. FML

#1445711
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43697) - you deserved it (10555)

On 04/29/2009 at 12:52am - misc - by broomrape (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today after two monts of unemployment I got a call from a marketing firm offering me an interview for an entry-level position. Wile Googling te company I discovered it's a scam. I graduated college in 3 years wit a 3.5 GPA an te only interview I can get is at a fake company. FML

#1394893
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50099) - you deserved it (4545)

On 04/27/2009 at 3:46pm - work - by Journo (woman) - United States (New York)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: