firedrake48066

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firedrake48066

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2409
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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firedrake48066's page activity

Visits<b>Helldemon</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 5:03pm<b>anonymousguy1569</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 9:56am<b>arak</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 3:46am<b>mini9094</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 11:12pm<b>MysteryManPerson</b> - the 04/05/2013 at 10:45pm<b>beautycrush495</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 12:15am<b>falafels</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 5:54pm<b>KatjaM</b> - the 03/12/2013 at 3:42pm<b>incendiaaa</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 3:23pm<b>oj101</b> - the 03/06/2013 at 3:41am<b>alligator729</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 12:28pm<b>coleiab125</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 2:58pm<b>hoffmanam</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 9:21pm<b>SerpentBoy</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 5:51pm<b>I_iz_B_a_troll</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 8:03pm<b>swifty94</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 8:28am<b>Celina_Lune</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 1:29pm<b>dan_in_wi</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 2:35pm

firedrake48066's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of firedrake48066's badges

firedrake48066's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2013 at 9:13pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, while on vacation, I think I met my soul-mate, and quite possibly the love of my life. My vacation is to celebrate my 8-year anniversary with my husband. FML

by not funny but :( / 03/28/2013 at 12:24pm / United States (Ohio) / Holidays

Today, I was on the subway when I felt like I was going to faint. I got off the train at the next stop, walked to a bench, but fell over and passed out. When I woke up, I looked around at at least 25 people, who had stepped around me, passed out, in the middle of the platform. FML

by wowthanksworld / 03/22/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Transportation

Today, my dad came out of jail. He showed me his tattoo of a bible on his chest with all his 13 kids' names on it. I'm the only one whose name is spelled wrong. FML

by XoxoChula / 03/22/2013 at 1:41am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I kissed my gorgeous new boyfriend for the first time. I ran my hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out and five lice crawled onto my hand. FML

by eww. / 03/22/2013 at 1:28am / Australia / Love

Today, there was a new girl in one of my classes. We both corrected a classmate on his grammar, so, trying to make a new friend, I leaned back to her and said, "Haha, fellow Grammar Nazi?" She gave me a disgusted look and told me she was Jewish. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2013 at 6:43am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML

by me / 03/21/2013 at 6:25am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML

by meeee / 03/21/2013 at 6:01am / United States / Intimacy

Today, a pregnant friend who is due in 2 weeks posted a picture of a baby on Facebook. I commented congratulations. She's still pregnant. It was a picture of her baby who died 3 years ago. FML

by seamonkeys / 03/21/2013 at 5:42am / United States / Kids

Today, I learned that if not for my grandfather gifting my dad $200, I would have been named Anthrax. FML

by cheeseburglar_9000 / 03/20/2013 at 9:11pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tossed half a sausage to a dog sitting beside a park bench. It wasn't until he lunged for it and dragged the man beside him off of the bench that I realized it was a seeing eye dog. FML

by SolaceInRage / 03/20/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I went out to a restaurant to meet a girl that I met online. When I arrived I texted her and she said she was wearing a blue shirt. The only person that was wearing anything blue was a fat man smiling in the corner. FML

by bobthenun / 03/20/2013 at 5:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into an exam after having stayed up 20 straight hours studying. The professor looked at me and muttered, "Don't bother, I'm failing you either way." FML

by Tired / 03/20/2013 at 4:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out to Applebees with a girl I like and a group of friends. Someone asked if the girl and I were dating. She instantly replied with a bit of disgust "What? No way, never!" It would have been nice to know before paying for the last ten or so dates we went on. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2013 at 1:38pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, as I was walking with my boyfriend, holding hands, a woman began screaming at us about how we "f*ggots" are "ruining America." I'm a girl. FML

by Too manly / 03/20/2013 at 12:54am / United States (California) / Love