Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

finished

Search for a member

finished

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 12 January 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2954
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About finished : I'm a british girl living in the south of France, I like being smart assed and sarcastic but I can be serious when I want to (rarely :D) I rarely check my messages as I go on the site with my Ipod but feel free to message me as i'll reply sooner or later. And yes i do spontaneously break out ninja moves whenever I get the chance to!!
Oh and i'm not a grammar nazi but if there's a grammar fight i'll be sure to join in!

THE GAME

I also love music and play lots of different instruments. I'm a video game fanatic and I love vampires+ supernatural creatures!!

Quote time!!!:
“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”
-Marilyn Monroe

finished's page activity

Visits<b>Valcannos</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:00pm<b>gerbleherg</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:11pm<b>iSnipeFatPeople</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 11:56am<b>XxOtakuDemonxX</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 5:29pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 10:26am<b>dotalover</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 11:42am<b>SilverWings312</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 10:08pm<b>gabylikescheese</b> - the 09/19/2013 at 4:29pm<b>CrookerRooker</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 12:46am<b>ignoremeimweird</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 3:02pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 2:42pm<b>chandlerbelacic</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 10:39pm<b>heifersue</b> - the 03/21/2012 at 11:00pm<b>takeitandrun</b> - the 02/26/2012 at 1:44pm

finished's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of finished's badges

finished's favorite FMLs

Today, I called my husband, who is currently stationed in Japan, to see how he was doing. According to his girlfriend, he's doing fine. FML

#19174580
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43158) - you deserved it (2520)

On 02/27/2012 at 12:42pm - love - by unknown - United States

Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

#19174199
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35050) - you deserved it (5315)

On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom

Today, I was very cold and tired, so I took a shower to warm up and went to bed. The minute I hopped into bed, it collapsed and broke. I have spent half-an-hour rearranging furniture to get the mattress on to the floor. Now I'm cold again. FML

#19173617
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20808) - you deserved it (2884)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had to ask my boyfriend to stop measuring his penis during our conversation. FML

#19173399
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25685) - you deserved it (3788)

On 02/27/2012 at 6:06am - intimacy - by facepalm (woman) - United States

Today, my dog managed to pull a one-pound package of raw bacon out and eat the entire package including the cardboard. The vets cheered when they finally got him to puke up the entire, unchewed package of bacon. FML

Today, my dog managed to pull a one-pound package of raw bacon out and eat the entire package including the cardboard. The vets cheered when they finally got him to puke up the entire, unchewed package of bacon. FML

Today, while I was eating lunch at work, I practically had a panic attack because I'd forgotten to feed my Neopet. FML

#19168741
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8965) - you deserved it (32242)

On 02/26/2012 at 4:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17173) - you deserved it (29494)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, the captain of my school's girls wrestling team asked me out. I politely declined. She angrily locked me in the trunk of my own car. FML

#19165097
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32864) - you deserved it (5547)

On 02/26/2012 at 1:12am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was babysitting. Everything was going well until the kid called 911 on me for making him eat his vegetables. FML

#19164733
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30384) - you deserved it (2845)

On 02/26/2012 at 12:16am - kids - by whattabrat - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that during fire drills, my school lines everyone up next to some extremely flammable and explosive propane tanks. If we ever have a real fire, we will all die. FML

#19164372
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28686) - you deserved it (2144)

On 02/25/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by afraidtoburn (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I decided to take a peek in my fiancé's vow book to see how far he's got. The only thing in there was the lyrics to a song from the movie Shrek. FML

#19164325
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10400) - you deserved it (24609)

On 02/25/2012 at 11:09pm - misc - by KMO - United States

Today, I was washing dishes when I picked up a plate and saw a huge spider. Trying to be nice, I took the plate outside and tried to gently push the spider off. The wind blew it into my eye. FML

#19164002
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28184) - you deserved it (5113)

On 02/25/2012 at 10:13pm - misc - by baconandkittens (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while waiting for my grandmother at the train station, a girl walked out and climbed into my car. When I cleared my throat to tell her of her mistake, she screamed and ran out as if I was a criminal trying to abduct her. FML

#19162083
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25892) - you deserved it (1987)

On 02/25/2012 at 4:38pm - misc - by eldar90 (man) - Israel

Today, I told my mom about an article I'd seen that said people tend to make the most mistakes at 2 to 3 in the morning. Without a trace of humor in her voice, she said, "Tell me about it. You were conceived round about then." FML

#19161830
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24970) - you deserved it (2839)

On 02/25/2012 at 3:51pm - misc - by fmlsomuch - Japan



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: