[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

fenn

Search for a member

fenn
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 579
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

fenn's last visitors

Freeze

fenn's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

fenn's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized my new kitten is the spawn of the devil. It decided to go get itself stuck in a tree. I tried to climb up to rescue it. But it kept climbing higher. I was about to grab the cat when I fell. The cat then jumped down and started purring. FML

#3731184 (156)

I agree, your life sucks (33394) - you deserved it (6126)

On 07/13/2009 at 11:03pm - animals - by WearingOff (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my younger brother, who is 15, had to show me the quickest way to take off a woman's bra. I'm 12 years older than he is. FML

#3642336 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (38024) - you deserved it (9127)

On 07/10/2009 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by nerd_man01 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was taking a shower and I saw a new body wash that said "radiance ribbons." That sounded a little effeminate, but it smelled manly enough and the only alternative was normal soap, so I used it. Just now, I stepped out into the sun and found out what "radiance ribbons" means. I sparkle. FML

#3639578 (580)

I agree, your life sucks (47859) - you deserved it (22669)

On 07/10/2009 at 1:03pm - misc - by takinabreak (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my husband gave me an ultimatum - choose him or my male best friend. I chose my husband. My husband then admitted to me that he was hoping I would choose my best friend so he would have an excuse to leave me and wouldn't have to tell me he's been cheating on me. FML

#3634399 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (53495) - you deserved it (2705)

On 07/10/2009 at 5:21am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I turned 23. I had asked my mom for some things to decorate my new place. As I opened the box to reveal my gift, a mirror was inside. I liked the mirror. I did not like the note attached that said "Look inside the mirror to see who is now 100% financially responsible for themselves." FML

#3627514 (177)

I agree, your life sucks (29753) - you deserved it (12931)

On 07/10/2009 at 12:08am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years admitted why his pet name for me is "his beautiful swan". Apparently, the first few years we were dating, he and his friends secretly referred to me as "the ugly duckling" because my sister was so much hotter. FML

#3611862 (120)

I agree, your life sucks (43714) - you deserved it (2038)

On 07/09/2009 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I heard a student in the class I assist having trouble with a download. I walked over and showed him how to save to his flash drive, and how to use 7z to unzip said file. I then found out I'd just assisted him in downloading a half gig of porn during class. FML

#3608539 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (31052) - you deserved it (6411)

On 07/09/2009 at 11:00am - misc - by TingBarter (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was waiting in line for breakfast at the McDonalds drive-thru. After getting so fed up that the line hadn't budged for 10 mins, I decided to pull out of the line just to realize I was waiting behind 2 parked cars that were just to the left of the drive-thru lane. FML

#3607672 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (5635) - you deserved it (38391)

On 07/09/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by StUbbY (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML

#3604059 (242)

I agree, your life sucks (13851) - you deserved it (42679)

On 07/09/2009 at 3:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I was in the car with my mom and dad. My mom turned around and asked, "Have you had sex yet?" I said no, which is true. My dad cracked up and said, "Told you so!" My mom frowned, took out her wallet, and handed him 20$. My parents bet on my nonexistent sex life. FML

#3602722 (115)

I agree, your life sucks (50868) - you deserved it (3153)

On 07/09/2009 at 2:33am - intimacy - by Told_You_So (woman) - United States (California)

Today, during my shift at the restaurant, my boss's daugher came in. I could not help but notice she was almost popping out of her low-cut top. After having a private chat with her mother, my boss took me aside and said "my daugher's got eyes, you know, not just a pair of tits". FML

#3533033 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (8283) - you deserved it (34166)

On 07/06/2009 at 7:28pm - work - by Cody (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML

#3484293 (190)

I agree, your life sucks (41957) - you deserved it (16632)

On 07/04/2009 at 5:07pm - love - by DutchOven (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, at lifeguard class, I played a victim while my peers strapped me to the backboard in the water. When I was strapped down, I got wood in a wet swimsuit. My hands were strapped down so I could do nothing to hide it. FML

#3271305 (222)

I agree, your life sucks (51595) - you deserved it (7014)

On 06/27/2009 at 9:47am - intimacy - by Victim (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my attractive boss sat me down in the break room to say how much she appreciated how much work I've been doing despite being a temp. She was wearing a skirt, and I couldn't take my eyes off her legs. She then patted me on the leg and said "Good Talk". It wasn't my leg. FML

#3267231 (188)

I agree, your life sucks (31168) - you deserved it (11531)

On 06/27/2009 at 3:03am - work - by EmployeeOfTheMonth (man) - United States (California)

Today, I learned my 40 year old father is marrying a girl barely a year and a half older than me. She told me not to be afraid to call her mom. I was torn between punching her in the face and vomiting. FML

#3264690 (278)

I agree, your life sucks (55394) - you deserved it (1853)

On 06/27/2009 at 1:32am - misc - by OfCourse (woman) - United States (Illinois)