fbhorn

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fbhorn

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4682
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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fbhorn's page activity

Visits<b>thatkidhesh</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 4:42pm<b>Catkam623</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 2:08pm<b>Vanessa_Leeann26</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 6:42pm<b>ImAFaker</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 1:32am<b>Ergayles</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 11:55pm<b>FMLJFL</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 9:08am<b>karlcolt45</b> - the 02/13/2013 at 4:47am<b>qwillis98</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 9:40pm<b>hayhay2301</b> - the 02/01/2013 at 10:16pm<b>rkmn8r</b> - the 02/01/2013 at 6:13pm<b>Love_sosa</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 9:31pm<b>aileen15</b> - the 01/02/2013 at 11:15pm<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 11:10pm

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fbhorn's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML

by potassiumgirl / 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML

by potassiumgirl / 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML

by erockinthesuburb / 04/11/2012 at 12:25pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, while outside, a bug flew up my nose. After I told my family and friends about a faint vibrating in my upper nostril, they all convinced me I was paranoid. That was until that night when I blew my nose and there was the bug in my tissue. Its leg was still twitching. FML

by baugy / 04/10/2012 at 10:19pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, I woke up to the sight of a zucchini and a condom on my bedside table, along with a note saying "I know it's tough being single." Apparently my mom has boundary issues, my dad will laugh at anything, and the fact I just got dumped means nothing. FML

by Madeline Lee / 04/09/2012 at 5:34pm / France (Aquitaine) / Intimacy

Today, after being filled with joy after seeing my very elderly cat finally enjoying the sun in my garden, I skipped over to give her a hug. Turns out she was taking a shit. FML

by Ew. / 04/09/2012 at 11:22am / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, I got mugged at Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2012 at 1:15am / United States / Money

Today, my boyfriend told me that he believes getting kicked in the balls is a scientifically-proven method of birth control. FML

by Jordan / 04/08/2012 at 6:37am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I watched my cat walk to her litter box, look at it, then walk across the room to pee on a backpack. FML

by tessamarque / 04/05/2012 at 11:07am / United States (Oklahoma) / Animals

Today, I decided to spray tan myself. Five minutes later, I had to pee, so I did. Not only do I now have two orange stripes on my toilet bowl, but I also have two big white stripes on the back of my thighs. FML

by Wannabees / 04/03/2012 at 1:13am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I was texting my girlfriend about cross dressing and I said, "It would be hard for me to conceal my weapon." She instantly replied, "Not really, it's like finding a needle in a haystack, you'll be alright." FML

by DanteWest1000 / 04/03/2012 at 12:43am / United States (Nebraska) / Intimacy

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he said "I love you, baby." I told him to go deeper, but instead of doing so, he decided to completely kill the mood by stopping and saying it again in a Barry White type voice. FML

by anonymous / 04/01/2012 at 2:38pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I overheard my fourteen year old daughter talking on the phone. Apparently, as of last night, she and her best friend have their "official licenses in muff diving". FML

by Gavin / 02/20/2012 at 4:19pm / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Intimacy

Today, I came home to my fiancé and his mates playing Monopoly naked in our backyard. FML

by anonymous / 01/14/2012 at 6:42am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sold my Xbox and Kinect to a guy. I forgot that sometimes I'd play Dance Central naked, and the Kinect would make videos. This guy now has videos of me, naked, badly dancing. FML

by anonymous / 01/13/2012 at 12:05am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous