This member hasn't filled in the description.
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19525) - you deserved it (5800)
On 04/25/2012 at 4:06pm - kids - by KC (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)
Today, while at work, a man grabbed my beard, said it was impressive, and then uttered the words, "I love you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17014) - you deserved it (1902)
On 04/25/2012 at 2:46am - work - by foshizzle (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16775) - you deserved it (1813)
On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like a woman's orgasm. After laughing, I realised that I'm probably too immature to be washing my own clothes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6654) - you deserved it (15196)
On 04/24/2012 at 10:03am - intimacy - by mmmtortilla (woman) - Spain (Pais Vasco)
Today, I blurted out something like "humdidumdum erm lalala" in public, attracting mystified stares. The thing is, I do this every time I remember something embarrassing I've said or done in the past, in an attempt to erase it out of my consciousness. So it happens a lot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11698) - you deserved it (6655)
On 04/20/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by Ashamed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I somehow managed to hit my head on a first aid kit. I now have a cut on my forehead and my boyfriend just keeps laughing from the irony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14791) - you deserved it (3100)
On 04/18/2012 at 4:18pm - health - by 352 - United States
Today, I found out my boyfriend and I have more in common than I thought. We both are sexually attracted to men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32780) - you deserved it (2282)
On 04/18/2012 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by caitlinz5 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was on a first date. She asked what I do, so I replied "I create adverts." She then yelled, "F**k you" and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15346) - you deserved it (2844)
On 04/18/2012 at 4:48am - love - by James C (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)
Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28487) - you deserved it (2406)
On 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by lindsaykay - United States
Today, while I was in the midst of the most mind-blowing shower sex ever, the fire alarm went off. My girlfriend had left the stove top on and the entire kitchen had caught on fire. So instead of finishing, I frantically ran around naked trying to douse the flames. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19973) - you deserved it (2638)
On 04/17/2012 at 2:13pm - intimacy - by blocked_by_fire (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was looking through my Internet browsing history. Apparently my wife had searched "How to have an affair without getting caught". FML
I agree, your life sucks (29871) - you deserved it (1912)
On 04/17/2012 at 2:11pm - love - by Jason199615 - United States (Missouri)
Today, I found out that I can get my girlfriend to make more sex noises by massaging her back than I can by actually having sex with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16570) - you deserved it (5784)
On 04/16/2012 at 9:59pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20183) - you deserved it (2555)
On 04/16/2012 at 8:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I held up my best friend with a lighter shaped like a gun, and jokingly accused him of sleeping with my wife, only to have him admit that he really did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38153) - you deserved it (3717)
On 04/16/2012 at 4:12am - intimacy - by oface13 (man) - United States
Today, my dad came to pick me up. It would have been nicer if he'd had his clothes on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16475) - you deserved it (1093)
On 04/16/2012 at 12:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
